One of my favorite movie scenes is in Dumb and Dumber when Harry Dunn, played by Jeff Daniels has just been hit by the Ex-Lax that Lloyd had slipped him. Harry is stuck on the toilet and the noise coming from his butt brings tears to my eyes.
With two minutes left to play in the Super Bowl I am standing outside, barefoot, as Sequoia does her best Harry Dunn impersonation.
It was a great day. Beautiful weather. We went to church and then we went to my sister’s house to watch the game. We spent the afternoon at a beach in Manchester-by-the-Sea. This beach allows dogs, and Sequoia and my sister’s Weimaraner, Hayley, ran all over, and Linnea, Becky, Bernie, and I jogged up and down the beach for an hour and a half (need to throw in the great little kettlebell workout we got too). It was good for the dogs, and good for us, and it was good to see Sequoia playing so nicely with all the other dogs.
It was Sequoia’s first time at the beach, and it was funny to watch Sequoia guzzle the Atlantic. She couldn’t get enough…and then the diarrhea started. I guess the ocean water acts as a natural laxative.
Now it is late, and the Patriots are 18-1. I guess this ends the arguments of ‘greatest team ever’, the 1972 Dolphins are probably showering in the bubbly right now. Kind of sucks for New England, people around here will be pretty depressed I guess, I am also assuming that the rest of the country loved to watch them lose. I imagine Belichick is watching film of draft picks right now, gearing up for next year, we always have the Celtics…best record in the NBA right now, and baseball starts in a little while.
I cried when the Pats lost to the Bears in Super Bowl XX. I cried when the ball went through Buckner’s legs in 86. I was down when the Pats lost to Green Bay in 96. I was ecstatic when the Pats won in oh one. I was euphoric when the Sox won in 2004. Then the Pats win two more, and the Sox pick up another one…I really did expect a win today, and tonight I go to bed a little deflated.
But I am not a very good spectator, I love the feeling of my team winning, but I refuse to identify with a loss, especially when my total investment in a team is selfish. I don’t sacrifice for the team, I don’t collect a paycheck from them, I won’t receive an apology from the team tomorrow. It really doesn’t matter, it is just a fun escape. That loss does not effect my life.
Sometimes I wonder about this life where we spend most of our time spectating (how about church?). Life goes by minute by minute, day by day, year by year, and we miss it (same seat in the same pew every friggin week). We get together with friends and watch other people live. We talk about what other people are doing. We debate and argue, criticize and discuss athletes and politicians and pop stars and we miss our very own lives. What are we afraid of?
We miss our children growing up as we pursue a paycheck. We go into debt buying stupid little toys, gas guzzlers…we pursue careers hoping our boss or our position will give us the meaning and affirmation that we missed somewhere. We spend hours flipping through the channels and buying into the advertisements and propaganda. We stay up too late, we sleep fitfully, we sleep too little. We hit the snooze and drag our raggedy butts out of bed to face another day living someone else’s dreams, pursuing someone else’s goals. We stress, we have panic attacks, we kick the dog, we take medications….
I fully believe our true lives are right there waiting for us, just begging us to be who we were created to be, “please” our souls beg, “I was made for more than this”. And we know it. Tomorrow I will attempt once again to live the life I was meant to live, fully present another day. Figuring it out one step at a time.
For now, I guess I will mourn that loss and hope Sequoia doesn’t need another trip outside tonight.
