Fundraising is a part of the World Race whether we like it or not, and I was worried about that from the start. How was I supposed to raise over $16,000, pay for gear, afford my plane tickets, and do all of this as a full-time student?
So I let fear get the best of me and I jumped right into fundraising. I started selling shirts and bracelets, talked about the Race a little too much, and started writing my support letters. That’s where I got stuck, and I wondered why I was suddenly having such a hard time with it.
It took me a little while to figure out what I was doing wrong, and the short answer turned out to be “a whole lot of stuff.” I compared my approach to the World Race as a whole to how I approached fundraising, and the comparison was shocking. Before even applying to the World Race, I prayed liked crazy. I wanted to make the right choice. I asked God for his counsel and guidance. I sought out a “support team” of trusted friends to help me through the decision-making and application process.
Did I even consider doing any of that with fundraising? Nope. I just started doing things, working on fundraisers, and completely forgot about God’s hand in the process, which is pretty darn important. I somehow got it into my head that fundraising and the Race as a whole were in my control, and it came back to bite me, and it hurt. I had lost my focus on what was important and turned fundraising into an idol. That’s right, I said the I-word. It consumed me. I made it the center of everything, and I know it shouldn’t be.
This isn’t the first time, and it certainly won’t be the last time, that I face something like this. It’s so easy to get caught up in mindlessly “doing” things and losing sight of the reason you’re doing them. Serving God without developing your time and relationship with God turns into busywork, and no one really wants that.
So I’m taking a break. While I can’t stop fundraising altogether, I’m taking time to meditate and pray first. Rather than make my own decisions and then ask God for help getting out of the mess I made, I want to move forward with his guidance.
A friend of mine inadvertantly reminded me of this once again today, with a thoughtful post about Mary and Martha, from Luke 10:38-42.
As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
As my friend Kelsey eloquently puts it: “Jesus reproved Martha for serving Him at the expense of spending time with Him. [I] need to remember that the only essential thing in [my] Christian walk is learning from Him; not serving in church, the nursery, the community, or being involved in 17 different causes. What a relief that is…”
Martha drives herself crazy and snaps at not only her sister, but Jesus – a situation we’re not free from even today – when she thinks she has to do everything perfectly, and “her way.” But Mary concerns herself with only one thing: the presence of Jesus and what she can learn from him. And what does Jesus say to this? “Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Fundraising and the World Race could easily be taken away from me, whether or not I want it to be. The same can be said for anything physical or material in our lives. Even non-tangible things like relationships and ideals will come and go. But the things that won’t ever go away are the important ones: salvation, the love, faithfulness, and goodness of God, and the fact that he holds our lives in his hands regardless of circumstances. That’s what I should be focused on.
