You asked and I answered!!!
Thank you all so much for sending me questions. As I prepare for my trip to Haiti and the Dominican Republic I challenged myself to be as open and as vulnerable with you guys as possible. So this page is to answer some of your questions. Feel free to comment down below some questions you might have whether it be about my trip, my faith or me personally. Don’t be afraid to ask anything the more questions the better!!! I broke the questions up into three sections so it will be easier for you to find answers to specific questions: questions about my trip, questions about my faith journey, and lastly personal questions. Thank you so much!!!
Questions regarding my trip
•How did you pick to go to Haiti and the Dominican Republic?
Originally I applied for a trip to Swaziland and South Africa. I applied for that trip because for a long time I have had a heart for serving those in Africa but specifically Kenya. One of my friends is on a trip through World Race and spent 3 months in Swaziland. I loved reading her blog posts and hearing about the work she has been doing which made me really excited about applying for the trip to Swaziland and South Africa. I was particularly happy because both in Swaziland and South Africa the ministry was focused on working with kids. I have always loved working with children and was excited that I would be serving in an area I was comfortable with. The Swaziland and South Africa trip seemed perfect, almost too perfect where something wasn’t settling right in my heart. Through the Christian Organization I am in at Grand Valley, we often times go on prayer walks sharing the Gospel. I always love sharing the Gospel but I know that evangelism is an area in which I wanted to grow. I then learned that Haiti and the Dominican Republic trip had a month dedicated towards evangelism and a month dedicated towards youth ministry and there was a third trip to Cambodia and Thailand where they would be focusing on evangelism. For a while, I was torn between the three options, unsure if I wanted to have a mission trip where I know I can serve to the best of my ability or one in which I challenged myself to grow. I prayed that God would reveal where I should be serving for this upcoming summer, though I felt as though I wasn’t getting a clear answer. I think this is because the Lord was happy I was serving Him and knew He could use me no matter where I ended up picking. So I turned to others for advice. One friend asked me what I currently was reading in the Bible, telling me God isn’t silent if we open our Bibles. At the time I was reading the book of John, more specifically the passage on the woman at the well. This is one of my favorite passages and he wanted to know why. I explained to him that I was amazed at the woman’s transformation after coming to know Christ. How she went from going in the heat of the day to fetch water in order to avoid others from running through the streets proclaiming the word of God. She was amazed that Jesus was able to tell her her whole life story, though all he mentioned was her greatest struggle. I thought it was funny how she defined her life as her biggest mistakes, but don’t we do the same? Yet God saw so much more for her and her life. I was nervous in general for this mission trip because I always was ashamed of all the mistakes I have made and I loved this passage a lot because I often times feel like I can relate to the woman at the well. After telling him this, he laughed and said so the passage you read was about a woman spreading the word of God? It seemed simple and clear yet I was blind to see it. Soon after another friend advised me to go to either the Swaziland/South Africa or the Cambodia/Thailand trip. She said that those trips were so much cooler that Haiti and the Dominican Republic. At that moment I felt my heart go out to Haiti and the Dominican Republic, I wanted this trip to be about serving God above all else and I did not want to go for others to be impressed. My heart was leaning towards Haiti and the Dominican Republic but I was not certain when it came to deciding. I decided to put it in God’s hands trusting he will place me where He needed me. I vocalized to my trip advisor I did not know if Swaziland and South Africa was where I was feeling called and that I just wanted to go where I was most needed. He informed me that no one had applied for Haiti and the Dominican Republic trip yet and asked if I wanted to switch my application over. I am confident that I am going exactly where I need this summer. With the civil unrest going on in Haiti I have seen myself and those around me grow in trusting the Lord and His plan.
•What made you want to go on this mission trip?
I want to go on this trip to serve God and others. I have always had a heart for wanting to serve others and am so excited to have the opportunity to do so this summer. Additionally, for a long time, I have been considering going into Ministry or Missionary work and I am hoping this trip will help me discern my calling.
•What is your biggest fear going into this trip?
Honestly, I feel like most people would expect the answer to be my safety since the recent conditions in Haiti but I feel at peace. I trust the organization I am going with to decide the best possible plan for keeping us safe and more importantly I trust in the Lord. Something that I am really worried about is allowing myself to get in the way of truly serving. I am afraid that I will allow myself to be consumed by my own physical and mental needs to truly be in the moment and serve other’s needs. I fear I will let my pride take over rather than allowing the spirit to work within me.
•How did you feel God’s calling to go on this trip?
I personally am someone who does not like to make a decision unless I know for certain that it is the right choice and I am very indecisive. So by deciding to go on a mission trip like this is not like me. I originally heard of the organization World Race from my friend, Anna Goward (check out her blog!!! She is doing such amazing work annagoward.theworldrace.org). I have had a heart for serving others and often considered going on a long term mission trip but I never thought I actually would go because it was not “ideal.” Though of course, God had other ideas for me. Over the summer of 2018, I applied for both World Race and YWAM (youth with a mission) though I did this more so I would be able to say I at least applied and wouldn’t regret not applying but once again I never thought I would actually be going. For a while, I have considered going into missionary or ministry work but I never wanted to admit it out loud. A friend of mine helped me realize I have a passion for helping others allowing me to finally admit I wanted to go on a mission trip. Though as I said I am indecisive and tried to push it aside. Though Christ is persistent when pursuing us. I went on a retreat through my college ministry, InterVarsity. On this retreat, they began to play the song build my life. We sang the lyrics, “I will build my life upon your love, it is a firm foundation. I will put my trust in you and I will not be shaken”. At that moment I broke down realizing I was not living fully trusting in the Lord ( attached a really cute picture of this break down below just kidding there are millions of pictures I’d rather share but this is about being open and vulnerable). I thought about how I thought about going on a mission trip but pushed it away since it wasn’t in my plan but it was in God’s plan. If that was not enough, the woman who was leading worship stopped singing and said “The Lord is speaking to me wanting to tell someone that it is okay to know exactly what you are doing with your life, He wants you to know he is walking right alongside you. Deep down God knows the desires of your heart and you know what you are passionate about may not be easy but God will help you through it all.” Soon after my small group leader, Blake Staffne announced to our small group he would be leaving in the winter to go on YWAM. His heart for the Lord and his trust when facing the unknown stirred the idea of going on World Race or YWAM in my heart once again. I began to meet with the leader of InterVarsity, Nolan, to help mentor me as I tried to discern what my next steps were. I was planning on going back to working at Springhill for the summer but now was conflicted. He said he could not give me an answer because either way I was glorifying God but he recommended a book to me, Just Do Something by Kevin DeYoung. He said that often times Christians biggest mistake is not doing anything stopping us from growing. I bought the book and the second chapter it asks “What should I do this summer?” “what should my major be?” “What kind of career do I want?” “Should I be a missionary” and “should I volunteer here or there?” I felt very convicted reading this because I found myself asking these very questions. After reading this I decided to take a chance, stepping into the unknown and go on World Race. In my racer blog “Discerning my calling” I go more in-depth on deciding between YWAM and World Race. 
•What do you hope to personally take away from this experience?
I am trying to go into this trip without expectations so I don’t miss out on all of what God has in store for me. Though I am hoping this trip will help me discern any future career plans as well as growing more confident in my relationship with God.
•How can I be praying for your trip? Anything else you want or need to feel supported?
You are so sweet!!! I am honestly so blown away by everyone’s kindness and I truly appreciate your support. Our team could use prayers for safety as we depart to Haiti soon. I personally could use some prayers for some anxieties I have going on the trip. Please let me know if you have any prayer requests:)
Questions about my faith journey
•When did you become a Christian?
I became a Christian March 4th2017, roughly two years ago at a retreat. Growing up I was taught about God but it wasn’t until I was 17 years old that I started to understand what it meant to live a life devoted to God and I am definitely still learning a lot as I grow in my faith.
•When were you baptized?
I was initially baptized in the Catholic Church as a baby in the summer of 2000. Though it is my personal belief that one should be baptized when they come to know Christ as a public proclamation of their faith. I was baptized in a non-denominational church named Oak Pointe on April 26th of 2017 shortly after I became a Christan.
•What is a doubt or area that you struggle with overall? Why?
Two specific areas I wrestle with is trusting God has my future planned out and self-confidence. I like to have everything planned out whether it be plans on how I spend my summers, whether or not I will get married, where I will live in the future, what career path I might pursue, I want to know. I have plenty of ideas of what I want my future to look like but living a life fully devoted to God, I know He has even greater plans in store. So waiting on His timing and trusting that everything that has happened is apart of His plan is something I struggle with time to time. Regarding self-confidence, I personally doubt myself. I struggle to see my self worth time to time, I struggle to see that God could ever use someone like me and I struggle with feeling like I am not enough. Thoughts like this break our father’s heart and it is something I definitely need to work on.
•What has God been teaching you recently?
I do not even know where to begin with this question. Coming into college I thought I already faced some of my biggest trials. Coming to know Christ was a long journey and I often doubted my ability to serve being that I was so new to my faith. Though I made my faith my own and the summer of 2018 I was in scripture more than I was ever before so I didn’t think I would feel a drastic change coming to college. Man was I dead wrong. College is a fresh start, no one is there to pressure you to go to church, say your prayers, or find a Christian community but it is something you have to seek out for yourself and in doing so I truly learned to prioritize my faith. Each and every day I am learning more and more about God. He has taught me to be patient, trusting, and courageous he has taught me how to love on others, feel true joy and so much more. The list can honestly go on and on because my relationship with the Lord is constantly growing. I am hoping to document some of what Christ is revealing to me throughout this entire journey on my blog.
Personal questions
•What is your favorite Bible verse?
Ahhhh there are so many good ones!!! Two verses come to my mind though every time I am asked this. The first is Jeremiah 29:11-13. The reason this is one of my favorites is because it has played such a pivotal part of me finding my way back to Christ. This verse states, “11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” While I was struggling with whether or not I believed in God, these words were exactly what I needed to hear. God knew that and had me open my Bible to these verses. The full background story is on my testimony page of my racer blog (please feel free to check that out). The other verse that comes to my mind isn’t a very well known one, it is Acts 20:24. This verse states, “24 However, I consider my life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the good news of God’s grace.” This verse may seem harsh to some but how this verse is filled with truth. Right now in life, I am filled with so much uncertainty; what career path will I choose, will I get married, where will I be living in the future? All of these uncertainties consumed me for a while until I remembered all that does not matter in comparison to what awaits. My sole purpose is to glorify God and if I don’t do that then there is no point to living. I was once asked, “Do you truly believe in the Gospel if you are not willing to devote your whole life to preaching it? If you truly believe in the Gospel, then you will know nothing in this world can compare to Heaven that awaits.” This seemed harsh but so true. Acts 20:24 is the anthem in which I live my life: fearless and faithfully serving God.
•Are you plugged in on campus?
I am plugged in on Campus! I am apart of a community called InterVarsity. Coming into college I knew I wanted to find a Christian Community to surround myself with. Growing up I only attended Christan Schools and knew going to a secular college would be a change of pace for me. I quickly realized that there were many ministries on campus and become overwhelmed with trying to pick one. I saw tables around campus for Campus Ministry and Cru and gave them a try. Though I grew frustrated because they did not talk about what their organization stood for. They promoted pizza, fun, and games which don’t get me wrong I understand they wanted to draw in a crowd. I just knew the organization I joined I wanted to feel poured into and I wanted to know what they believed. A friend told me that a true Christian organization worth being a part of will seek you out, and that same day InterVarsity saught me out. I was walking back from class and I came across a table for InterVarsity. One of the leaders stopped me asking me about my life and genuinely cared about my responses. After doing so, he asked if he could share the gospel with me and prayed over me. It was refreshing to see someone with such a strong faith willing to pray over college students unashamed to put on display his beliefs. I decided I would give InterVarsity a try. Though at the beginning of the school year I struggled to transition into college and skipped a small group meeting. I did not think that anyone would notice but one of my small group leaders came to visit me at my dorm. She realized I was not the type of person who would typically skip unless something was wrong. By her being there for me, I was shown a community that genuinely cares like none other. After that night I dove all in at InterVarsity finding my home on what seemed like a large campus. Through InterVarsity I did not just find a community but I found a family to grow my relationship with God. On campus, I have had the opportunity to evangelize to some of my friends and I can say there is nothing more rewarding the proclaiming the word of God to others. I also have been able to meet several times to study under some of InterVarsity’s leaders and participate in retreats with them. Not only do I feel better equipt to share the gospel but I also feel as though a new fire was lit within me. I am so blessed o be apart of such a great Christian community.
•What denomination would you consider yourself?
I have found I have been asking myself this lately. Growing up I was raised Catholic, though I would say I never really knew God but rather knew about him. Eventually, I fell away from the church. Though my friends who went to a nondenominational church pointed me back to God. For a while, I held so much bitterness and anger towards the Catholic Church that when I became a Christan I would have considered myself apart of the nondenominational church. With time I no longer have that anger towards the Catholic Church. I will say that growing up some of what I was taught I never agreed with that went alongside with what the nondenominational church taught. Though it is hard to suddenly disagree with I was taught for the majority of my life. I will admit, I do not fully know the differences between the nondenominational church and the Catholic church to feel confident saying one or the other. Truthfully I question if it is even important, no matter what both denominations believe the same essential truths. They both believe that we as humans failed and sinned against the father causing a separation, God sent his only son in order to die for our sins, Jesus died and rose from the dead conquering death and opened the gates of heaven, and it is our job on earth to share of God’s power, grace, and love. What is important is that I am Christian, labels just cause separation and there is only one church. I do not think a being apart of one denomination over another is the breaking point of whether you are able to have salvation. It clearly states in the Bible in Ephesians 2:8-9 on how we are saved. “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast” -Ephesians 2:8-9.
•You have a tattoo right, if so what is the meaning behind it? (if not lol please ignore)
I am so glad someone asked this! Most people don’t even realize I have a tattoo or think I believe people shouldn’t get any. But I, in fact, have a tattoo I attached a picture below for those of you who haven’t seen it and so it will be easier for me to explain. To begin I know there are many concerns people have regarding tattoos and whether or not it is a sin and whether or not they are safe. I assure you my parents made sure I did my research regarding the safety of getting a tattoo. I will admit I read all of the concerns but, everything one may do in life could be a possible danger. I made sure to go about getting a tattoo in the safest ways possible ( I won’t bore you with all the details but if you want to know more you can contact me). I personally also do not see it as a sin but that is my personal opinion and I know not everyone will agree. I chose to get a tattoo as my personal promise to God. The words “beautiful surrender” is the name of a song written in my handwriting. I chose this song because when I gave my life to Christ this song was the theme song of the retreat. My youth pastor asked if I was willing to let God take control of my heart and soul like the lyrics in the song professed and ever since then the song has a lot of special meaning to me. I practiced writing it out because I wanted that to be my written promise to God that he will always have my heart and soul. The first date is the date that I gave my life to Christ and the second is the date of my baptism. I chose these dates because I truly felt God’s presence on these days. Whenever I doubted God, I wanted to have carried these times with me to remember that I might not always feel God’s presence but He is always present regardless. I added the cross because I wanted it to be a constant reminder of God’s sacrifice for us. I chose to get my tattoo on my arm for multiple reasons. One reason is that I used to struggle a lot with self-harm which I explain in my testimony, by having my tattoo on my wrist it is a reminder that when I am at my lowest God is there right beside me. Another reason is because I wanted it to be visible to myself and others. I want everyone to know I am not ashamed of my faith and by wearing a cross I represent Christ at all times challenging me to live as best as I can. Another reason is because I wanted my tattoo to be by my heart but I wanted it to be visible, so I am sure you all heard of the cliché saying “ to wear one’s heart on their sleeve” well my heart belongs to God so that’s why it’s on my arm. Lastly, I chose to get my tattoo facing up when I raise my hands. I did this because we raise our hands in worship, in the classroom learning, or even when working. In everything I do not just worship, I hope to glorify God. So that is the meaning behind my tattoo:)
•What is your favorite color?
Ahhh okay this is actually a hard question for me haha!!! My favorite color to wear is forest green or black. I feel like forest green is a fun neutral color that is calming yet adventurous looking yet black goes with everything. Though my favorite color to look at is either blue or purple. If it is the perfect shade of purple I like it overall shades of blue but I love every shade of blue. But I am really starting to like pastel yellow. I feel like yellow just describes my personality, full of energy and joy, I don’t know haha. Sooooo I’m never really sure what color to say when people ask me my favorite color. Like a said before I am really indecisive!!!
