“I want to, but I don’t.” This is said so often in so many different scenarios. It is said when a tragedy happens. It is said in connection to self-improvement. It is said in regard to education and sports. But the worst use, in my opinion, is connected with spiritual growth and relationships with God and people.
Don’t believe me? How many times have you heard, or even said variations of the following:
“I want to help you clean up your flooded basement, but I need to cook dinner for my family tonight.”
“I would love to cook a meal for your family so you don’t need to worry about it while you plan your son’s funeral.”
“I want to lose weight and start running again, but food is just so good and my schedule doesn’t have time for a workout.”
“I want to get my homework done early for once, but all my friends are at that party tonight.”
“I want to make the varsity football team, but workouts take too long and I wouldn’t have enough time to hang out with my friends.”
In all of these situation, someone may truly want to do what they say, but as it is not their priority, nothing changes. I’d read all of these statements (even the ones I say!!) as actually saying, “I want to, but as it isn’t a priority, I really don’t.”
Now think about these other statements you have heard or said:
“I want to spend more time reading the bible, but my schedule is so crazy I just want to sleep and relax in my free time.”
“I would pray for you right here, but I have a meeting for which I am late.”
“I want to spend an hour in prayer every morning, but I have to be at work so early and I always so tired I sleep as long as I can.”
“I want to be part of that ministry, but I just have too many night meetings this week…. And probably next week, too.”
I’ve said something like these multiple times in my life, including on the World Race! When we say these things, we are stating that I and my wants are more important than our relationship with others and our relationship with God.
Racers, you are not exempt from this mentality. Here are a couple for you:
“I want to go do ministry, but I’m tired and haven’t had enough time in Sabbath rest this week, so I can stay back because I can say I’m spending time with God.” Interpretation: “I want to, but I’m more important than my ministry, so I really don’t.” Ouch.
“I want spend time every morning talking with God and worshiping him, but ministry is taking so much out of me that I just want to sleep until breakfast is ready.” Interpretation: “I want to, but my rest comes before God, so I really don’t.” Ouch again.
The instinct to put “me” over God and “you” is human nature. Even Paul struggled with this in his life. Romans 6:18-10 “For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep doing.” Even the most notable missionary of the Christian movement knew he was not exempt from the selfish instincts inside of him.
The only way we can stand against this instinct is to walk in obedience to God, one little step at a time. Making the little decisions, like getting up 5 or 10 mins earlier, can help form habits in your life, and help make the bigger decisions, like cutting something out of your life to make room for prayer.
The advice I can give is simple: ask God. Be prepared for the hard answers when you ask him though. You may not like the answer you get. I know I’m not going to get all pleasant answers when I ask…
#GodIsInControl #redefiningdisciple
#THIRD
