Yesterday (Sunday) I spoke at the Indonesian church our team attended. I was speaking on human traditions, and how they are good and bad. Good traditions can supplement the word of God, but they become bad when they take away from what God wants us to do. Speaking with a translator is harder than it looks…
Anyway, when I got up, I was feeling frustrated for no reason and after taking my Malaria medication, my stomach started turning. I was ten more frustrated. I knew this was an attack of the enemy because of what I wanted to share. There was no reason to be frustrated at all, and the medication had not given me any issues for three weeks, and that was the morning my body was having issues with it.
As we got ready for church and breakfast, I was contemplating letting my team know what was going on, and asking for prayer. I would think about it, and tears would start to come because I was so frustrated. We got some food, and I was just ready to tell them, and Denise asked if there was anything she could do to support me. Instant tears.
I told them what was going on, and asked for prayer right then. Just crying and having prayers and positive words spoken over me helped. But my stomach was still not great, and I wasn’t feeling perfect. I was just sucking up the feelings at that point and kept moving. However, knowing my team was supporting me and praying for me was enough.
We went to church, and in the middle of worship, Jess turned to me and said she was praying for something to encourage me, and God told her to tell me to trust him. He was supporting me and I just needed to trust him.
As we sat down for the rest of worship, a different teammate (I don’t remember which one) asked me if I was ready. I just smiled, but I couldn’t say yes. Then I realized I didn’t have to be ready, because God has been ready for this moment from the beginning of time. He knew exactly what I was going to say, and I could trust him.
I was still nervous because I don’t like standing in front of people, but I knew that God was going to say the words he had planned years ago.
This principle of trust is something on which I am working, but it is getting easier. I am recognizing the situations in which I need to trust God faster, and letting go of control is slowly becoming my go-to response to these situations.
#GodIsInControl #redefiningdisciple #IAMTHIRD
