As I am preparing to leave for the World Race in just 4 short months, God has really been working on heart to refine my character and prepare me for my journey. With that being said, it has not been an easy few weeks to say the least. God has brought a lot of JUNK to my attention and has revealed many of my sinful motives, desires and ways. Some of these include my desire for control/comfort/safety, my stubbornness to “do what I want,” and idolization of romantic relationships and marriage. Can ANYONE help a sista out and relate here?!
Anyway… The main thing God has been speaking to me lately is to count the cost of truly following Him. In doing that, I must surrender ALL, including something so precious to me-relationships. I want to take control of the relationships in my life and create the outcomes that I think will be best. I have the tendency to seek or desire a romantic relationship rather than a beautiful, deep relationship with God.
So, here I am in the process of sorting through these things. I cannot even tell you how many people have said to me lately something along the lines of “you have to go through the process to get to the promises of God.” So many of God’s people have had to go through the process to reach the promises of God. Let’s just take Joshua as an example. He led the Israelites through the desert, across the Jordan and then walked around the wall of Jericho for 7 days until, by the grace of God, the wall fell down. PROCESS. In Joshua 1:3, God promised Joshua, “Every place that the sole of your foot will tread upon I have given to you, just as I promised to Moses.” PROMISE. Through the book of Joshua, the Lord is with them in the midst of battle, fighting with them and for them, fulfilling that promise which came to fruition in Joshua 21:43, “Thus the Lord gave Israel all the land that he swore to give their fathers. And they took possession of it, and they settled there.” The book of Joshua is such a beautiful example of Joshua’s obedience to God, willingness to surrender and walking through the process.
And so today, I want this to be my declaration: I SURRENDER. I will stay in the process. I surrender my relationships, my desire for a comfortable life and my desire to do what I want. My prayer is that the Lord would continue to be so gentle and patient with me and continue refining me like silver so that I can serve Him and serve the people of many nations with a pure heart.
So where do you stand? This whole relationship with God thing and walking through the process will not always be easy. Sometimes it will be downright hard and will bring you to your knees in tears because God is calling you to surrender something so precious that you are clinging to with your life. That ‘thing’ is different for all of us; perhaps it is similar to mine: the desire for comfort or the desire for a romantic relationship or maybe it’s that job you don’t really like but that pays well or struggling with a physical ailment that seems to have no cure. Maybe it’s a broken relationship or a financial struggle. I don’t know where you’re at. But I know we serve a God who is bigger than all of our troubles and who wants to wipe every tear from our eyes if we would just let Him.
I leave you with this word of encouragement from Romans 8:18-19. “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the creation waits eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God.” Keep the eternal perspective and keep on fighting the good fight 
