For a long time, I have always known this is what God desired for my life… Except I always wanted to do what Sarah wanted to do. So, I moved away from family at 19 and well, Lived the life that I wanted to live….
I moved to the beach, where I spent most of the days at the beach, and the nights I spent working. Living near the beach, its hard to find Christians seeking the same will. I did however, meet one amazing friend. We spent time down at the beach, reading the bible… but with our busy schedules.. It was here and there. I would say that I went to EVERY single church on that beach. I went to every denomination looking for a church. But I was alone… I never really realized how important it is to surround yourself with Christian believers.
1 Corinthians 15:33 says, "Bad company corrupts good character."
You eventually become like the people you spend the majority of your time with, so it is important to surround yourself with godly people who will lead you closer to the Lord. I didn't do that. I didn't live that. I was so self absorbed, that what I thought was right, was really wrong.
Prov 14:12- There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.
I spent 10 years doing what I wanted. Chasing what I thought the will of God was for my life. What I have always desired in life, is to live a simple life, be a wife, and a mother. I went back to school to be a nurse, because If I couldn't travel the world and help people (my ultimate goal), then nursing would be the next greatest thing to help people. I struggled for 10 years to find my place. Where I would really fit in to. But I never asked God. I just assumed I knew what I thought was good for my life, and I did it. I always had God in mind, but I know now, that my 10 years away were a struggle because I was living outside of "HIS" will for my life.
After nursing school was over in 2011… I had the world ahead of me. I could go anywhere and be a nurse. My thoughts of traveling the world had diminished, and I was ready to embark on this journey of nursing ANYWHERE in the US.
I made the decision to move to another state. With friends… Not my hometown. When I was driving one day looking at different hospitals in this city, loud and clear I heard " You need to go HOME." That next weekend, I came back to Nashville for a visit, found a hospital, and moved home a few weeks later….
Since the moment I made my decision to finally follow what God wanted, a weight has been lifted off my life.
I have been a Christian for a long time, and was baptized as a baby. The conviction after moving home grew strong of getting baptized. I was baptized on January 28, 2012. Best decision I have ever made. 🙂
So now, I am home, Im a nurse, I am near family and attending church regularly. I am on track and loving my life. This is the life God desires for my life.
WRONG… One night at work, about 2 am, I come across the world race on my computer. I have NEVER heard of it, I have no idea why I came across it, but when I saw it, I knew this is where God wanted me. All of the sudden I got anxious and so excited in my spirit, but was this a reality? Really God? I have an amazing job, im home with my family, I have bills to pay, student loans to pay…. I prayed, I filled out the application, and i waited. And I was accepted for this amazing journey.
Suddenly, I was overwhelmed with panic. I love my life God, I have bills…. I came home for you, I'm doing what you want… So I decided not to go. Everyone who knew me gave me all the reasons also why I shouldn't go. It was me jumping to something new. For the next few weeks I made all the excuses in my head of why my decision not to go was right, but every time there was a sermon, someone was talking, I always felt it was back to if God tells you to do something you had better listen.
Now I was even more confused, scared….did I say really confused…. Until one night my mother brought my step dad and I into the living room. She told me that she was never okay with me going on this trip. She didn't understand why I wanted to go. She told me that she had only heard God's voice one time in her life. She also said that when she was sitting in church on a Sunday morning, she was praying, and for the second time in her life she heard loud and clear…. "She Must GO". Tears running down my face at this time. Running down hers. It is your will God. And I don't know how I will get there, but I will go. So I committed to going on this World RACE. And God I am committed to you. Wherever you lead me, I will follow.
I don't know how I will get there, but I have faith that God will pull through for me.
Mark 16:15 " Go into the world and preach the good news to all creation."
So with faith, I will go Lord.
I am excited and ready for the next steps in my life. It really feels great to be inside HIS will.
Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.
John 7:17 If anyone’s will is to do God’s will, he will know whether the teaching is from God or whether I am speaking on my own authority.
