I used to wake up sometimes feeling stressed, wondering,
what I’m going to do with my life. What is my purpose? Love? Guys? School?
Sometimes I still do wake up stressing over these things. Sometimes I let my
thoughts obsess over one particular thing, or goal I have set for myself. One
season it may be school, another season it might be a boyfriend. But what I’ve
noticed is that when I let my thoughts obsess over these things, I have don’t
gain any answers. I am left empty, and still wondering what my purpose is;
because when I may have accomplished one thing on the list, where do I go from
there? Once I’ve accomplished that one thing, then what does my purpose become?
I may finally finish school, but then what is my purpose? When I look ahead of
myself, I deceivingly make myself believe that once I achieve these “life
goals” of getting married, having children, etc. that my life will finally be
filled with contentment and purpose. But it’s not true.
I remember in middle school thinking that I would find
satisfaction in High School. When I was in High School, I believed that
everything would smooth over in college when I was finally old enough to make
all decisions for myself, rather than under the influence of my parents’
restrictions and guidelines. Now, here I am, a college student, traveling the
world, finally seeing a pattern. Success is a word that we can only try and
live up to, but never actually reach. As soon as you’ve reached what you
thought was success, your definition of success will have changed. But this is
because so often we try to define our purpose in earthly achievements;
sometimes without even realizing it. I have to constantly remind myself that my
purpose lies in Christ.
Knowing that my purpose is in Christ, it instantly fills me
up. Until the day I die, my life is filled with meaning. I want to work harder
each day to be able to love the way He loves. To love even those who get on our
last nerve, and we all know how difficult that is. There is so much corruption
in this world, but even worse, there are so many people who don’t know Jesus.
People who don’t know that God will forgive them of their sins, and that they
can leave the past behind them. Through Him, they can start over with a clean
slate and start living a life for him; a God who has prepared a perfect place
of peace and happiness for us in heaven for eternity, if we just accept him
into our lives and understand that he died for us. He was beaten, bruised, and
hung on a cross to pay the penalty of the world’s corruption of sin.
Understanding that concept automatically fills our lives
with purpose. It would be tremendously selfish of me to not tell everyone I
know about this, because I wouldn’t wish hell upon even my worst enemy. I want
everyone to go to heaven. God gives me motivation to fix and change myself so
that I may attempt to present myself as a living example of the kind of love
that Christ has for us. My main man Michael Jackson once said that if you want
to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and then make a
change. I couldn’t agree with him more.
When the purpose in life changes from earthly
accomplishments to finding accomplishment in love – Gods love, and
demonstrating love to others, we can then find contentment.
God is teaching me so much patience this month, and my
thoughts have been pretty deep. Our ministry is very slow pace because it is
rain season thus people hibernate. A lot of times we won’t do anything at all.
This is very difficult for me, because I am a very on-the-go person. God is
teaching me to be still. America has definitely influenced me to always feel
the need to be doing something, but this month is teaching me to find rest in
God, and be thankful for the time that I can sit here and dive into the word
and be more sensitive to what He is trying to teach me. God bless Africa.
Merry Christmas to Everyone!
I love and miss you all!!!!!!
This is our church this month. Hand molded seats, pretty awesome huh? Very comfortable to sit in for 3 hours….
