I pray that you wreck me so that I may see your goodness.
This was the first thing I wrote down I training camp… And boy did the Lord deliver.
Training camp was the longest and shortest 10 days of my life. There were moments that I didn’t even think I would make it one more minute. There were moments I wanted to never end. The things that went down at training camp changed my life. forever.
How on earth can I even express these feelings with words. I don’t know if there is any way for me to fully show what the Lord did over these 10 days in somewhere, Georgia.
Even while writing this blog I am still not 100% aware of all that happened at camp.. but I do know a few things now.
I know the Lord loves me more than I can even fathom.
I know that in every struggle I went through, he went through it first.
I know the Lord is with me wherever I go.
I know my identity is in Him.
I know that He wants me to be myself.
I know He wants me to love myself.
I KNOW THAT IT’S OKAY TO CRY. (multiple times a day if needed)
I know now that he yearns for my heart.
I know my voice matters.
I know its okay to hurt.
I know the Lord LOVES me.
AND I KNOW THAT I AM WORTHY OF HIS LOVE.
I don’t know how to express everything I am feeling. I don’t know how to explain the unexplainable.
The 10 days I was at camp were the realest 10 days of my life. I was able to open up. I was able to share the worst of me. Everything that I struggled with was put in the light.
There is no way for me to describe the love I have for these people. I have only known these people for 10 days!! There’s no way that I love them like family. That’s not possible. I don’t even know how old some of them are. Or where they are from.
But I do.. every single person that I met in the past 10 days means more to me than I can even understand.
There is no way to explain it other than the Lord gave me HIS heart for HIS people.
Training camp has been like boot camp. through loss of sleep, food, energy, tears and so much more. I gained JOY.
There is JOY in BROKENESS. I can be on my knee’s weeping but have more joy than ever before.
Your grace is sufficient. Your grace is sufficient.
I have so much more I want to share. But don’t have the words yet. This will be the first of many posts from training camp. But it can’t happen over night. Thank you to everyone who helped me get here. I would not be able to have this amazing experience without you.
