“And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches and glory in Christ Jesus”
— Philippians 4:19
All my life I have struggled with receiving. No matter what it was or how expensive it could be, I did not like to accept gifts, or receive anything as little as a compliment. Over the years the Lord has challenged me in this area. It was a false sense of independence, as I believed that I had to “earn my keep” by buying my own things, to not be a financial burden to my parents.
For example when I was 15, I was determined to buy my first car. I didn’t want my parents to worry about a car payment or have to spend any of their money to get me a car. But since my parents already understood this issue I had and refused to feed my independent pride, after lots of tears, I accepted the car my parents bought for me. I ma not an orphan, I was not an independent. I had to let them in. And by letting them in, I was also opening up to let God in.
Another example was during high school, when a friend of our family felt led to buy me a new cell phone. It was so hard to receive such an expensive gift. It may sound odd for a kid to fight this receiving so hard, but I definitely needed help. Learning to let people in, let God in, repent from all this pride in wanting to be self-sufficient, and receive gifts big or small has been a huge training for me. My parents are in my life to be my support, and much of that includes taking care of me financially.
After years and years of dealing with having things handed to me, I’ve had many chances to work on my receiving, and it has gotten a LOT easier. One of the ways my heart has grown in receiving is to receive instruction and advice better.
Forward to now…. It’s April and I have just been accepted to go on The World Race. I was so thrilled and ecstatic for this opportunity, until I realized I literally had to ask people for money. I would have to write a letter to send out, asking for help financially in order to be a part of this amazing experience. This was so hard for me. It took me so long to figure out how to even write this letter. I didn’t think I was worth it. Yes, this experience with The World Race is one that I have yearned for my entire life. But I do not even believe I am worth a new cell phone, let alone almost 17,000 dollars!! I didn’t know how to even ask, let alone even consider receiving it.
This part of the Race has by far been the hardest part for me up to date. It wasn’t that I doubted God’s ability to provide this money. I never, for one second, feared not being funded. But asking for the help, humbling myself to need others, and then for that to happen so fast and so unexpectedly was nothing I could have ever imagined.
I AM FULLY FUNDED!
I have been so blessed by every person who has donated money to me, helping me with this exciting adventure. I am so incredibly in awe of how much everyone loves me and has been willing to help me in any way they can. Thank You to everyone who has donated. Some of you have chosen to remain anonymous, so I do not know how else to personally thank you. But here is my THANK YOU!!! this is just the beginning of a life-changing experience, where I have already been challenged to receive the Lord through your generosity. God will only continue to challenge and grow me from here, as a learn to receive Him in a million new ways on the Race. Thank you for everything you have done. I can hardly believe that I am already fully funded and get to live out this incredible journey that the Lord has made a way for me to do.
