Today I came home from work, and unknowingly jumped into a sea of things I need to get done. My thought faucet turned on as soon as I got home from work, and I forgot to turn it off as it began filling the room. I didn’t realize I was drowning until I stopped breathing for a second. I looked up and realized that I had started over 20 different tasks, but got distracted and started something new before completing the task.
I had two open boxes I needed to mail last week with the tape roll still attached to one. Next to those sat the beginning of a note stopped in the middle of a thought. Near it was an old to-do list I didn’t even bother reading. My open Bible with an empty notebook under it sat next to my half-drunk tea mug, and my notebook sat ready for me to write down prayers I didn’t complete. My fridge calendar was unfinished with a reminder to write a recommendation letter for a friend due in a couple days and crochet a scarf ordered two months ago. My pile of unwritten thank you notes stared at me from the kitchen table next to my half-eaten bowl of couscous while I stared at my empty fridge and realized how badly I need to go grocery shopping as I wondered if I have enough money to…OH RENT IS DUE TODAY! I pulled my checks out of the desk, which I need to clean out for its new owner, and got distracted by important emails I need to send. Oh yea, I need to ask if I can get help making a video and what about those letters I need to write? I wonder who I haven’t called yet. I bet I can sell that stuff. I need to work out. Did I eat today?
Suddenly I stopped breathing for a second. Woah. My roommate told me I needed to find peace in my stress, and I quickly retorted, “I’M NOT STRESSING.” His eyebrows raised in disbelief before I said, “Oh. Am I stressed? Oh my gosh. I’m stressed aren’t I?” I texted my squadmate Bridget about my drowning, and she prescribed a dance party, so I closed everything and cranked my iPod and jammed out. After getting out all my pent-up energy, I hit the floor in prayer. I don’t know how long it lasted, but it was the prayer trying to get out of me all day. It was like I had twisted up a water hose all day, and just let it go as it exploded out of me. I laid at the feet of Jesus and He took my heavy burden and gave me grace. After spending my much-needed time with Him, I felt called to write a to-do list and start getting things done.
As launch draws closer, this World Race thing is becoming more real each day, which both excites me and apparently stresses me out. Thank God He never lets me do anything alone. If I was still in my season of rebelling against help and trying to do all of this independently, I would have drowned today. Are you feeling overwhelmed right now? Jesus loves you so much that He wants to help carry your baggage; You just need to let Him. I promise you can’t do it alone.
