“What man among you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake?”
We have so often seen these verses in the passage in Matthew about how we have such a good Father who lavishes His children with good gifts. Jesus is encouraging the people to keep asking, and as we all know the line: “you shall receive.”
Although several only half-believe, wrestle with, discredit, spit out these words everyone, whether it’s: the red-blooded southerners, the happy clappy, matching shirts, fanny pack-wearing vbs teachers and the opera singing nuns all know the passage. It’s always uplifting- a holy (and kind) slap in the behind to keep pressing forward and keep trusting The Lord who is and will be faithful. It’s a heavenly narcotic in the midst of life’s hardships (much like coffee).
But I beg you to make yourself a mug of coffee and have a seat to digest this iceberg I’m serving up. I promise, I’ll feed it in small portions by the lovin’ spoonful. Fix me a cup- I take mine black, and we’ll talk about how to take this verse out of the church into the rest of the world to make an impact.
So, my friend, despite all of the theology, gray issues, dogma and ceremonial differences woven throughout the church culture we can all be united on the fact that one of our most major goals is to become more like Jesus. Even if you don’t share my beliefs and declare Him as the Christ, you can at least admit that he’s a pretty nice guy, right? I mean, a round of drinks (top-shelf wine) on Him at a wedding in Cana, saving a woman from being stoned to death, washing people’s nasty, crackling, desert-skin feet. As Olaf from Frozen would say, “All good things, all good things.” If I didn’t believe He was God, I would at least want to be His friend.
I promise that there’s a point to this. Hopping off of my rabbit trail and back to the verse from Matthew, Jesus points out that God would not give a stone to someone who is hungry for bread. Makes sense, right? Good idea, God. Thanks for not serving us rocks and snakes for dinner tonight.
On this note, if our goal is to be like God and to represent God to the world, shouldn’t this be our philosophy? How often do we fail to listen to people or look for their needs and just give them what we think they need?
Husbands, if your wife expressed to you that she feels like you don’t spend enough time with her, buying her flowers and then going golfing with your friends probably wouldn’t work out, right?
What if you gave a starving homeless person a toilet plunger, dish washing tablets and some DVDs. That’s perfect to unplug the toilet they don’t own, wash the dishes they don’t have in the dishwasher they also don’t have and watching movies on the TV they don’t own, right? No.
Listening and observing has been a vital skill I’ve acquired on the mission field in so many arenas. For example: when I vent or verbally process with someone, I love encouragement and solutions. Naturally, when people vent to me, that’s what I tend to default to. What I’ve learned is that some people just like a listening ear.
With ministry, my talent is public speaking. I’ve gotten so speak multiple times every month and absolutely loved it. After every time, my team leader has always said, “That’s your best one yet!” I thought that she was just being encouraging the way a mom is when she says, “You’re the best daughter in the world!”
Then she told me how they really are getting better with time. After thinking about why that would be, I realized that the biggest change hasn’t been improved speaking skills. I never practiced in front of a mirror or sat around doing vocal exercises like, “how now brown cow” for hours. I just learned to listen better.
I thought my first sermon on the race was perfect. I worked on it for hours and looked up references. I made notes. I organized it.
But it didn’t seem to hit anyone. Looking back on it now, I realized that it didn’t apply or relate to the people at all. It did nothing to fit their very different frames of thinking or speak to their situations or cultures.
Month five in Panama, I worked with an organization which was so great about actually understanding the culture, he people, the problems and what God is doing there and jumping in. This is a different approach than showing up and giving the people what we think they need.
Our contact Jeff shared with me about how the churches in the area tend to disassociate with the indigenous people, and when the indigenous people join the church, they do the same to their own. I asked questions and gained understanding.
I based my sermon off of this, and by listening to Jeff and listening to The Lord, my sermon naturally formulated itself. The passage came straight to my mind, and the words rolled off of my tongue. The reaction was completely different from month one. Our contacts, Audi and Jeff said that the word was perfect for the people. The people reacted with, “Amen” and “Alleluiah” which means they love it in the Latin American church. it was so beautiful how everything was seamless when I let The Lord be savior instead of myself.
we also got to work with the indigenous people, which was anoter beautiful speaking experience. Jeff and Audi spent years spending time with them and gaining their trust and friendship. “The women used to just stand at the gate far away from us and never smiled,” they said.
After years of working to understand them, they earned the rights to speak into their lives. Because of this, years later when we show up, we were able to come down to their home- think hit by the river, we were able to cook with them, eat with them, dance with them, etc.
They smiled and laughed- something that took them years of relationship-building to do. That day at their hut was also key, because they got to know us before we invited them to our home for a church service.
When they came, my sermon also had to be tailored to speak to them, which I could have only done after getting to know them a little bit and asking questions about them. Audi and Jeff warned me that they may not sit and listen for an extended period of time and to keep it short and simple.
When the day of the service arrived, they showed up half and hour early- very uncharacteristic, and we made it a comfortable environment with songs, snacks and their cultural dances. When it was time for the message, everyone- even he children sat to listen as I gave he basic message of who Jesus is and what He did. For people who are used to gods who are like humans and are ready to smite them, this was great news, and I used scenarios they could relate to. The next week for the next service, hey we’re asking questions.
That’s how things get started. People are changed when we listen and love them and let God move. He knew them several years before our week, month or year long mission trips. He knows who they are. He knows what they need.
It’s no different in everyday life, which is also the mission field. Jesus always got to know people. He didn’t come to Zaccheus’s house with a Torah. He just had dinner with him. He didn’t give money to the woman at the well. He related to her.
If we listen- to people and to Jesus in missions, in marriages, in friendships and lives, change, beauty and healing naturally happens.
