this was a blog i’d been meaning to write for awhile. i tried a couple times but the words on the page didn’t correspond to what i’d been feeling for months, ever since i was displaced from my previous house in va, which was back in august, when it was warmer. much warmer.anyway. so… yeah. my heart’s been in tension, feeling very torn between two places. while yes, i am on staff with aim, i am not in gainesville. i’ve remained here in va. i committed to leading a “small” group at odpc for young adults in transition called “crossroads” (xr).
out of college, i myself had been a member of xr, then the year before i went on the race, i co-lead xr. surely, i must’ve written on this blog about the blessing this community has been to me. many of my friends at odpc have gone through xr, even if not in the same year as i did. after a year of coming home from the race, i am co-leading again.
as i’ve spent this year re-engaging with odpc while re-entering has been an interesting one. this church isn’t perfect, and we’ve a ways to go in bearing resemblance to Christ. but we’re getting there.
the last six months especially have been encouraging to me, as God’s been showing signs of answering prayer – not just my own – for Him to take us as a church to greater depths of intimacy and ministry. and as today is xr’s last lesson of the semester – we’ve met for ten weeks – i look back and marvel at how quickly the time has passed. even as i’m typing these words, my eyes just water; i hadn’t expected to be so in love with twenty something twenty-something brothers and sisters.
even the challenges i am facing as one of the leaders is a sign to me that xr is more than just a nice bible study for a niche set of young christians. i’m digging in because i know there is treasure buried deep in this group, and i’m okay with getting my hands dirty to get at it. it’s like i’m asking God, “Daddy, I want it,” and He says, “go for it!”
i say all this because i thought after serving xr, i’d possibly move onto ga.
let’s be honest, friends. i grew up in nyc and transplanted myself in the dc area. two very influential, happening places. gainesville, aside from being home to aim and thus wielding spiritual influence, pales in comparison.
but, oh! the people there. half my squad is on staff w/ aim. i love that it’s so normal to connect with people at aim even when i first meet them.
i’d get to live in the kind of community that i never dreamed possible before the race yet experienced as a reality on the race. there is such a atmosphere of freedom for my spirit to be…alive…
so yeah. i’d been pretty torn. no, i’d been a lot torn. like my heart was one little boy’s lunch of bread and fish, being split into pieces that fed thousands…
(to be continued…)
