“What is my life?”
This is a question I have had to ask myself time and time again over the past 4 months. It is a question borne out of the sheer sense of awe and wonder that hits me every few days. It is asked when the day-to-day pauses just long enough for me to remember how crazy, special and beautiful this life that I get to live is. It hits me in the times when God chooses to remind me that I am traveling around the world with a group of some of the best people I have ever known. It strikes me, sometimes, when I see a beautiful landscape or a gorgeous sunset in a far-away land that I never even had dreams of going to. A couple of weeks ago, I asked myself the question while I was walking across the bridge from Myanmar into Thailand and looking at the mountains in the afternoon sun. Only a few days ago, it struck me as we were riding in a bus through northern China, in a snowstorm, only a few hours after stopping the bus for a sandstorm, on our way into Mongolia. Before I get too far into this, I want to pump the brakes and be careful that I don’t paint too much of a romanticized picture of the Race. Anyone reading this blog who is considering going on the World Race, heed these next words. The Race will not fulfill you. It will not give you life. It will be hard, at times very hard, and it will feel a whole lot more like regular life than you would imagine it could. You will struggle with the exact same things you are struggling with now and if you don’t deal with those areas of your sin, you will continue to do so. The Race will not fix you. Traveling the world will not bring you joy, not real joy anyway. Your life will not look like the Instagram accounts that get featured during 98.3% of your time on the field. Whatever you are running from, it’s going to follow you here, too. And that’s kind of the beauty of it. The World Race IS an invitation to go places with the Lord that you have never been. It IS a way for Him to get us out of our comfort zones so he can do the transformative heart surgery that He wants so badly for us. Because He wants us to be in deeper relationship with Him, and He wants us to realize our identity as sons and daughters of the King. And that IS pretty dang awesome.
I don’t write this post to exalt my lifestyle or say “Look at me, look how cool I am”. I write it as a praise to God for calling me on this journey and extending the invite into this amazing life. I write it, too, because even in doing this crazy journey called the World Race I still have to stop and take the time to be thankful for everything that this journey is. Even traveling around the world and seeing all of this crazy stuff, I can still forget everything that He is doing for me on a daily basis, because that’s how ungrateful I can be. I think about the example of the Isrealites in the Old Testament. God brought them out of slavery in Egypt, and all they could think about was how uncomfortable they were. He gave them their daily bread, every day, without fail, and all they could do was whine about not having any meat. Moses left them for just long enough to get the 10 Commandments from God and they built a idol to worship. Are you kidding me? Oh, how quick to forget they were. Oh, how foolish. It’s often easy for me to look down at the Isrealites in judgement, until I realize I am so guilty of the same exact forgetfulness and foolishness. Remember earlier when I said that God has to take me out of the day to day sometimes to show me the beauty of this life that He has called me to? I don’t think that is something I struggle with alone. I think it’s a human condition. I think it’s something that we all must fight against. We have to fight each day to remember who God is and what it is that He has done for us.
The truth is, it doesn’t matter if we are in Mongolia or Myanmar or the good ole US of A. If we aren’t walking hand in hand with the Father, we are gonna miss just how amazing this life is. If we aren’t fighting for that thankfulness consistently, constantly, we are probably going to miss a lot of the beauty that God wants to show us. I said this thing one time, and I’m pretty sure it was 100% Holy Spirit and I still think it’s good and applicable so I’ll say it again here.
The height of our joy can be measured by the depth of our thanksgiving.
In saying that, I mean that we can only experience true joy to the extent that we are truly thankful. So often, I am like those Isrealites in my thanksgiving. I refuse to see all of the good that God has done for me because I am so focused on the thing that I feel like I need. God gives me a beautiful gift, and I am so quick to look for the next one, not even really enjoying the very thing that was given to me for the purpose of bringing me that joy.
Maybe you aren’t crossing international borders every few weeks. Just based on the odds, you probably aren’t. Maybe your life doesn’t look like the Instagram account and videos you see from the World Race. Wanna know a secret? Mine doesn’t either. There are a lot more days that feel like normal life back home, than days where we climb mountains and swim in lakes and ride weird animals. God is showing me how to appreciate those days in between. I am definitely not there yet, and I feel like I miss it more often than not. But, I have come to the place now where I realize that the Race will end. And “normal” (as if there is such a thing as a normal, following Christ is really anything but normal) life will happen, whether I’m ready or not. I want to be in a place where I can see the beauty in those days, and be deeply thankful for God’s graces every day, even the “normal” ones.
“His mercies are new every morning, He is so faithful and His steadfast love will never end.” Lamentations 3:22-23, kinda
So, what are the beautiful things that God is giving you? What are the things that you are missing out on because you are so stuck in your day to day? What are the gifts that you open up and toss aside and immediately ask for more? How are you just like the Isrealites, and what can you begin to do to see the beauty, the new mercies, that God wants to pour out on you every day?
What is your life?
