homesickness. it’s real and it hits hard.
you miss the smells of your room, your favorite coffee shops (shoutout to Greenberry’s & Shenandoah Joe), your job (@ LOFT), your dogs, your favorite diner (thanks, Tip Top), and everything about your life back home.
for me, it hits hardest when I’m in a room full of people and, no matter where I turn, I can’t have a second alone (which is basically all the time). I think the end of this month has been hard because it’s really starting to hit that this is real. there’s no turning back and it’s reality; you’re here for 9 months. with these people. with these clothes.
in all honesty, the race is fun and an insane adventure with the Lord. but it’s also hard. it’s painful. and it’s grief-ridden. I’m starting to grieve the things I’ve decided to give up for 9 months: alone time, driving, shopping, normality. it’s not fun at all, and it makes me start to think I don’t belong here.
it’s not truth, though. my emotions don’t dictate my life. just because I miss the comforts of home doesn’t mean I should go home; it just means I need to fight harder, remember why I’m here, & how I got here.
I’m here because of Jesus. He gave up all the comforts we crave with our entire being; in His adult life, He never had a permanent home—He traveled and stayed with random people. He went 40 days without eating. He knows what it means to be uncomfortable, because He experienced it for Himself.
I got here because He provided exactly $14,951 through the graciousness of friends, family, and strangers. & that’s way more important to me than missing sausage gravy from Tip Top and my monthly (okay, weekly) vanilla latte from Shenandoah Joe. it’s way more important than my comfy bed and my discount from LOFT.
the race isn’t easy, but I was never promised easy. I was promised change. adventure. new relationships. and the things I miss and crave from home could never compare to my experiences on the field, even though I want them to sometimes. homesickness sucks, but this is so much better. I couldn’t imagine going through the same motions of work and sleep. this life is crazy and hard and crazy hard, but it’s worth it. I promise.
p.s. if you’re thinking about going on the race, do it. if you’re waiting for a sign to apply, here it is. if you want to know what it’s like, message me. read blogs. my squad mates are incredible and most of them are better writers than I am. ask questions. but most importantly, pray. I could tell you all day long how the race is incredible and hard and an insane adventure, but ultimately the Lord is the one you need to consult.
p.p.s. I’m fully funded now (praise Jesus), but my friend Shannon is still in need of support. Shannon is seriously incredible and she’s changing lives here in South America, especially mine. She is honest, real, and chases the Lord with all she has. see her thoughts over at shannonsusi.theworldrace.org and please please consider supporting her in anyway you can, whether it’s financially or in prayer. I promise you won’t regret it!!
