Coming back to America after almost a year overseas is definitely a process. Re-entry is hard, but like my sweet friend told me in Albania, “just because something is hard doesn’t mean it can’t be beautiful.” As I am embracing this new season, I wanted to invite you a little into the process. The following is a journal entry that I wanted to share with y’all to kind of understand where I’m at.
I’ve been in America for two weeks now and it’s been difficult. Don’t get me wrong, I have loved being able to see my friends and family, be part of TFC worship, and enjoy all the Whataburger and Chick-fil-a my little heart desires, but times have been challenging. It has been wonderful! But the sadness comes in waves. It could be a simple phrase someone says that takes me back to the other side of the world or the sound of a large group of people that remind me of my squad. It’s the little things that send my mind racing back to such an important part of my life.
I made the best mistake of scrolling through Instagram and reading through blog posts of my squadmates. The memories flood back. Praying for a man in Honduras to be healed of cancer. Making friends with the sweetest ladies in Guatemala. Dancing with the kids in El Salvador. Believing for a miracle in Justina’s health in Uganda. Experiencing the goodness of the Lord like never before in Rwanda. Worshipping on a mountaintop with new friends in Albania. Seeing love in action in Bosnia. Coloring with girls who were rescued from trafficking in Thailand. Praise dancing at 7am in Malaysia. Teaching English in Mongolia. Talking to a stranger in the grocery store in Sri Lanka.
When I sit and think about all that the Lord did by allowing me to partner with Him this past year, I become overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by His love, overwhelmed by His mercy. Any good thing that happened this year was solely the Lord’s doing, He just let me be a part of it.
Everyday is different. Every moment within a day is different. One moment I could be genuinely joyful for this new season and the next I could be grieving the end of this past one. Being able to process through those emotions is easiest when people ask questions. Through figuring out the answers I’m able to celebrate the Lord for the good things He’s done and will continue to do.
So when I see you, feel free to ask any questions even if you think it’s been asked a million times already. Honestly, if you ask a “favorite (country, ministry, day, etc.)” it’ll probably be different that the last answer I gave because I had so many favorites. Bring all your questions or none at all, either way I will love your company!
I love you all tremendously and am honored to be able to take this journey alongside you and I hope we can catch up in person soon!
With a grateful heart,
Sam
