The World Race is hard. Life is hard. Something I’ve been learning about a lot lately is when things are hard and you really don’t know what to do or how to keep going.
Over a month ago I contracted the Chikungunya virus in Haiti. This mosquito-borne epidemic is sweeping through the Caribbean and took its toll on my squad and myself. After battling the virus twice, over the course of 3 weeks, I thought I was finally in the clear.
My fever was gone. My headache was gone. My rash was gone. But the joint pain never left. And a month later it is still here and worse than ever.
I wish I could say that I have kept a positive attitude and that I’ve had continued hope in the Lord throughout all this pain, but I can’t. I have curled up on my sleeping pad and cried until I couldn’t cry anymore. Today I once again found myself at a breaking point. Tears started rolling down my face as a friend put my hair up because my elbows wouldn’t extend far enough to get myself ready for ministry. As we did a team heart check I found the tears flowing because I just can’t take it anymore. My body hurts and my heart hurts even more.
CHIKUNGUNYA HURTS!
For over a month now it has been a major part of my everyday life. I cringe walking up the steps and I have minimal movement in my wrists and hands. The pain is horrible and sometimes I can’t see the end of this tunnel, but today a friend, who is battling this same fight, reminded me that God is still present in our current struggle and we can see Him if we look hard enough. Even on days like today, when I just wanted to give up, He was there in the laughter of my squadmates and the encouragement of great friends and family. Sometimes it is easy to lose hope and just grunt my way through the day, but when I stop and think of what I am learning and how this struggle is helping me grow, I see God and His Almighty and powerful love. For people at home, or other racers on the field, who are dealing with their own struggles, I urge you to seek the Lord in everything. On the worst days, look for Him, because even in the hurt and the pain, He is there and He wants us to lay it all down for Him.
Chikungunya has taught me a lot. It has helped me to surrender my pride and learn to accept help. It has taught me to find joy in the midst of pain and it has only confirmed what I already knew; in my weakness, God is strong. So right now I am operating solely out of my Father’s strength. Each day is a blessing and a step on the road to complete healing. I ask that you join us in prayer for strength, hope, and healing. There are several members of the X Squad that are still fighting this nasty virus and we ask that you join us in the battle to defeat the physical pain and the emotional discouragement that comes with it.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
-2 Corinthians 12:9-10
Thank you Father for the healing that you have already done in my squadmates and myself. We are grateful for the good days and the bad days. We continue to rest in your strength, knowing that you are here with us. Give us continued strength to finish the last 2 weeks of this race STRONG; physically, emotionally, and spiritually. In all that we do, allow our Chikungunya to bring glory to you through our actions and daily decisions to find our joy in YOU. Amen.
with love and an ice pack,
Sam