“The king is enthralled by your beauty; honor him for he is your lord.”
– Psalm 45:11
About 3 years ago, a dear friend of mine sent me an e-mail with this verse.
She explained how it’s nice to read the first part and be encouraged. The king is enthralled by your beauty. Great. I’m beautiful. The king is enthralled by my beauty.
She encouraged me to look deeper into the next part.
Honor him.
The best way to honor him? BELIEVE that he is enthralled by your beauty. Walk in the freedom that you were fearfully & wonderfully made in HIS image – and that, my friend, is beautiful.
I do not struggle with how I look. I just don’t. Even when the locals call me fat, I just brush it off. I know that God has made me – my body, my skin, my hair – just the way it is. I honor Him by loving His beautiful creation.
Recently, I have been wrestling with this whole “definition of beauty” thing. I know that I’m beautiful inside & out.
My identity is NOT found in my body. Not at all. I may not be a drop-dead gorgeous super model, but I know that God made me beautiful & that HIS beauty is shining from the inside out of me. I’m walking in freedom from body image issues & from finding my identity in the mirror.
But then I started thinking…how much freedom am I really walking in?
While talking to a teammate about her hair – I kept saying, “It’s just hair.”
That night I was trying to sleep, and I just couldn’t. No matter what I did, I could not make myself fall asleep. I kept feeling like I should cut my hair. I wrestled with that thought so much.
“Maybe I’ll wait until tomorrow night & have Amy cut it for me.”
“Maybe I’ll just cut it a little bit…”
But I kept feeling the urge to chop it all off. ALL of it.
Dang it.
I didn’t want to, but then the song “Beautiful” by Bethany Dillion came on my ipod. I knew I had to do it. [God is a funny one, isn’t He?]
So I went into the bathroom with my scissors & I began chopping.
When I finished, I looked in the mirror & I promise you I have never before in my life felt more beautiful.
EVER.
I definitely do not think it’s the haircut that makes me feel beautiful, but the freedom of knowing that I walked in obedience to cut my hair & knowing that my identity, my beauty does not rest in my hair. I love it. I absolutely love it.
