Yes, I have listed below 2,012 expectations for this upcoming year of my life. I KID. Pinky promise.
January World Race 2012
So our expectations for our mission trip is another one of those topics we are encouraged to expound upon a bit and really think about before we actually leave for the year. And though training and the World Race launch is several months away, I can't help but think forward to what I'll experience or what I'll see while on this trip.
Now I've read enough blogs to know that we'll basically be asked to throw out any and all expectations for what this experience is going to be like. I can accept that and understand that to a certain extent. We tell the students I help train for Camp Adventure more or less the same thing and I've learned to more or less do that the past several summers. Things may be a little more concrete in certain areas with our program, but there is plenty you won't know or find out about until you actually walk off that plane for the first time. So while we're told not to come in with any, I'm obviously going to have expectations of what this year of my life will look like whether I try to throw them out or not. It's just going to happen. So here we go.
I'll dive in head first right into some tough ones too. I have one expectation that I struggle with and I do not want in any way, shape, or form, yet it is there nonetheless. And I know that this expectation will only lead to disappointment, especially if I hold onto it or if it continues to sit in the back of my mind. I read the stories and see the videos or pictures of those who have gone or are currently on the World Race, and I expect that my experience will be like theirs. Witnessing the miracles others have seen, experiencing the personal growth some have gone through, taking part in the same form of ministry that others get to try, and so on. The truth though is it's a bad expectation for me to have, or at least I think so. I know it'll lead to disappointment if things to play out how I imagined them. What I'm struggling with and trying my best to be at ease with, is that My OWN story has been written. I have my own to live and not anyone else's. God will put me where I need to be when I need to and I will experience specific things that He has set before me. And that ultimately, that's what I need to see and experience for myself. Not the things that were meant for others. I hope that that all makes sense, and if not, you can still rest easy that it makes sense up in my noggin.
I expect to be blown away on a daily basis by God's grace, His mercy, His love, and His power.
I expect laughter and tears, stress and freedom, brokenness and healing, to love and be loved on.
I expect there to be days on the Race where the only way I'm able to roll out of bed (if I'm even in one to begin with) is through full and complete dependence upon the Father to get me through my day and to bless me with the strength I need and a strength only He can provide.
I expect days where I can't even begin to express how much I love my teammates and the other people I'm working with, while there will be other days where I'm so tired of everyone and that lack of alone time that I just want to scream.
I expect the highest of highs and some of the lowest of lows.
I expect to question. I expect to see things with my own eyes and ask God how in the world He could possibly allow for these things to happen. But I also expect my eyes to be open to His truths in these matters.
I expect grand adventures or amazing discoveries on some days, while others will probably be spent on the floor of a bathroom because I definitely ate something I shouldn't have.
I expect that most days, as much as I want to, I won't have all of the answers.
I expect to change. I expect a boldness within me to do things I never dreamed nor saw myself doing.
I expect GOD to blow away each and everyone of these expectations in His due time!
" Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3: 5,6
