As I’ve been preparing for The World Race, I can already look back and say that I truly wasn’t prepared for what would come along with signing up for this trip. (And I haven’t even gone to training camp yet!)
In the past few months, I have definitely felt pressure from so many different directions.
There have been situations that have popped up that just don’t make sense to me why they are happening other than the enemy is trying to distract me/scare me/confuse me. This trip is such a big commitment and in the past couple weeks I’ve had this feeling that I’m just not a “good enough Christian” to be doing something so big for God. I’ve been thinking things like “Wow I don’t pray as much as I should…I don’t have my life where it should be to do something like this…I’m such a hypocrite for going on this mission trip when I’m not being a light for Jesus in every situation now.”
I was getting so discouraged. And then about 3 days ago I was pulling into my driveway and I just thought “Matthew 11” …well for me, when I read the Bible I like to read the new testament but honestly I usually stay away from the Gospels as a go to book to read…not sure why but I just prefer other books. But I was like okay I guess I’ll see whats up with Matthew 11. And the passage that I first glanced at in Matthew 11 was vs. 25-30 labeled “Come to Me, and I will give you rest”
vs. 28-30 hit me so hard. I know I’ve read these verses before but it was like reading them for the first time. “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
Just knowing that Jesus said those words, and then spoke them straight into my heart gave me a little boost of joy. I don’t expect the next 5 months to become significantly easier, but I do find it peaceful that Jesus reminded me to just rest in Him when I do feel burdened, and He will give me rest. My God is so powerful, and yet he humbles himself to be “lowly in heart” so that I can seek comfort from Him.
Another squad mate and I have been talking about how we shouldn’t let ourselves put our joy in things other than God. Putting your happiness in things that can be taken away is a very quick way to become discouraged. So if you’re still reading, know that I am working on making God my full reason for being happy. Things on this earth will fade and disappoint and in the end will never bring me joy like the joy of the Lord. 🙂 So if you want, be praying that God will continue to show me that He ALONE is worthy of my time, commitment, rest, and joy.
Love you all. -S
