3/24/20
We didn’t get to be in Peru for very long, but I cherish the ministry days that we had and the lessons we learned. I cherish the fact we got to spend 2 evenings with English as a second language groups in totally different parts of Lima and that some of the students were the same in both groups. I cherish those relationships we were able to make with those students.
But most of all, I will cherish a lesson that I did not learn in ministry. I will cherish a lesson that COVID-19 taught me. I will cherish the opportunity to ride on a public bus.
We were returning the first night of our ESL class. There wasn’t much room. The bus was crowded. We stood in the middle, holding the hand rails.
There was a man on the bus.
He asked Rebekah and I where we were from.
She said we were from the United States. Just like any normal encounter. But the man was rude. He turned away immediately and put his headphones in.
At the time, I didn’t think too much of it. I continued with my bus ride as usual. In fact, it was so usual I can’t even tell you what I did the rest of the ride.
But I learned that night that Rebekah had been able to speak to the man again.
And what she learned was that the man wasn’t rude.
The man was afraid.
The man was afraid because the United States is where COVID-19 spreads from.
For that man, I was the face of fear.
He looked at me, and he saw a virus. And he was afraid.
And yes, that’s racism. A side of racism I can’t say I’ve ever really been on before. It devastated me. It devastated me that I was in a country to do good works and bring God’s love, but instead I was spreading fear by absolutely no fault of my own.
Rebekah was able to talk to the man and tell him we’d been in Costa Rica and hadn’t been in the US for 2 months. And then the man wasn’t afraid. They could talk and he didn’t fear her.
The encounter changed the way I wanted to interact with the country. It made me aware of how much my words mattered. It made me aware of how differently the rest of the world looks at people. How hard it is to blend in when you look different. It also made me grateful to live in a country that tries to address racism, that is able to acknowledge it and have conversations about it. Even though we still get it wrong, because I do see all of the Facebook posts about racism. I see the fear spreading in our own country. I see the mistakes and atrocities that have happened.
I experienced what it is like to be somebody’s fear in Peru that evening.
And unfortunately, I didn’t get the chance to put the changes I wanted to make into practice. We learned a night later that we were coming home.
But I am forever changed by that encounter on the bus.
And I know God won’t let that lesson be wasted. It’s a lesson I will carry into my life here in the US and potentially into wherever I’m called next. I don’t know what that means, other than I will always be more aware.
