Let me be completely vulnerable with you for the duration, here lately I have felt so lost and my own brokenness has weighed so heavily on myself. I feel so far from God and like there is this haziness in my head so I don’t know which direction I need to go in to get back to him, right now up is down and left is right I don’t know where to go or what to do. I feel like a fig tree that bears no fruit just leaves so it looks like I’m fruitful but I’m not. I feel so empty. If you knock you would here nothing but echoes of the fire that once burned so bright now it’s just embers. You would here nothing because I feel like nothing. And how heinous is that LIE! Because my Father calls me cherished, loved, beautiful, royalty, and created for a divine and holy purpose. He calls me His. That is the most beautiful and most honest thing I can ever be called because it is all truth. So while I figure out a balance and let God move me completely submitting to His will and ways. I may not know now what He is doing but that’s the beauty of it I don’t need to because HE knows what he’s doing, and he is a sovereign good God. I am so thankful that I am His and He is mine, because I know that I am still here for a reason His purpose for my life has not been completed. Gosh, his love is so endless I feel it even in my darkest days and my brightest nights. I am so in love.
Oh give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; for His steadfast love endures forever! 1 Chronicles 16:34
P.S. Sometimes I don’t think good is the right word to call God, like He is so much more magnificent than that, i feel like I don’t know a word in my entire vocabulary worthy of our holy God.
