Here is part two of my story.
We left off with me finding healing for a lot of emotional and spiritual wounds that I have had in my life. It was a great thing to have been healed, but this is how I walked in healing.
The wounds I suffered were healed instantaneously and in one moment God changed my life. I was cleansed of my sin and filled with His love, mercy, and grace. Now that I am clean, what does that mean for my life?
It means that regardless of what I have done, he has forgiven me. That does not mean that my past has no consequences for my future. This means that there is no longer shame placed upon me for what I have done. My actions were shameful and hurtful to people in my life, but that shame has been taken by God and has been replaced by His mercy and love.
Knowing this was my first step of walking in healing. Without there being shame to hold me back, the enemy (devil), could no longer use these past transgressions against me. Since the shame was gone, this allowed me to open up my heart.
An open heart was the second step of healing that I took. I allowed myself to love more deeply and it also allowed me to love myself more deeply. Love brought self-respect as well as a deeper understanding of how I see myself.
Most of this started to happen while I was in Honduras with Dar Vida. I was challenged by my team to listen, not be afraid to love, and be less aggressive with my words.
It’s funny how God was teaching me through my teammates. The more I listened, the more I loved, the more I spoke softly and gently, the faster and faster I grew. He knew exactly what I needed to hear and how to say it so I would receive what He had to tell me. It was through the guidance of my teammates that God brought me higher.
It was this calling that lead me to be baptized in the ocean in Tamarindo, Costa Rica. God’s grace, mercy, forgiveness, and love brought me to a place where I thought I needed to make a profession of faith. This profession of faith brought about a renewal of my spirit and brought be closer to God.
Although I was christened as a baby, I wanted this loud and bold statement to be a part of my testimony. So, in front of countless people at the beach, Lauren (squad leader) and Roger (coach) took my hands, asked me about my faith, allowed me to fall underneath the water, and pulled me back up. These two helped me make a profession of what had changed my life forever.
Laying at the bottom of the ocean is all of my shame and pain. It will be there for all eternity. I came up out of that water changed and renewed. I am stronger and I have some stories to tell because of it. Those will be the a part of another series.
Now that you know how I got where I am, I’d like to tell you about the people involved in getting me there.
Kat Law
She is a squad leader that gave me the words “In Flight.” She told me that these words meant that I was in flight. I was going from one place to another. I was not the pilot nor was I the copilot. My teammates and God were in control and they would guide me where I was to go. These words and guidance were the start of the overall process. I received these words in Guatemala. It took me almost a month to take them and put them into action.
Leah Nestor
Her wisdom and guidance were an invaluable part of my transformation. She helped me understand more about God’s word and its value in my life. The Bible studies we had in Nicaragua brought the word to life. Her words, wisdom, and knowledge of His word brought me to a place where I wanted to receive God’s benefits in my life.
Brenna Lucero
Her countless hugs and words of encouragement helped me open up. Little by little, she peeled away the walls that I had put up to guard my heart from pain that was no longer in my life. Our discussions of Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, and guitar lessons allowed me to let go of the pain I held in my heart.
Allison Hencke
Her leadership and patience have helped me so much. She first called me higher by giving me feedback that I definitely needed to hear. By acting aggressively in 1-on-1s, I was allowing my fears to take control of my relationships. Her words, wisdom, and guidance allowed me to grasp how to be myself and call others high in appropriate (non aggressive or forceful) ways. She has also taught me the value of listening to others and the impact of their words in my life.
Patrick Booth
This kind and gentle soul forced me and helped me process what the wounds really meant in my life. He helped guide me through my fears and aggressive tendencies. He helped me recognize and walked me through what it means to live by faith and not by fear. This allowed me to let go of my fears and walk more and more in healing.
Canada (Katrina Nixon)
Through many meaningful conversations, Katrina helped me process and live out walking in faith. Although she most likely doesn’t know it, she allowed me to voice my opinions and process why I voiced them in that way. She didn’t once fight or bite back at my words. Her kindness helped me get though some rough patches of what it meant to walk in healing.
Ashley Francis (Ash Fran)
Her constant wisdom and overall goofiness allowed me to slowly approach what it meant to be a Man of God. Her words of encouragement and willingness to chat made this seemingly effortless. She was also never afraid to hold a mirror up for me to see what I was walking through.
Lauren Kelsey
The woman of God that baptized me. It was her example of what it meant to walk in healing and as born again Christian that made want to strive for a better relationship with Christ and with my teammates.
Greg Patton
While he was only on the race as squad leader a short while, he helped me concisely see that there were areas of my life that needed improvement. He lifted me higher both spiritually and mentally. I’m glad that I had the opportunity to see God work in me through him.
These people are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the people that have helped me become the man I am today. I have so many others to thank, but these are the people I lived with on my race over 5 months. They have guided me and called me from where I was to where I am now. I have been unbelievably blessed by these men and women of God. I am thankful for them and the relationships I have developed because of them.
Thanks for reading and God Bless each of you!
Ryan
