Overwhelming Conviction

I have been convicted hardcore
in the past two weeks or so…

and I wanna share it.
I mean, I am supposed to pour my heart and soul out on here right? Right. Brace
yourself. Like the rest of us future racers, I have been absolutely
overwhelmed, scared, in awe, nervous, joyful, anxious, dramatic, nauseas,
pumped, felt like I’m in a dream, and overly ecstatic about this crazy
adventure waiting to be embarked upon in 2011. With all of these emotions I
have tried–key word tried– to comprehend what I have gotten myself into. I
feel so blessed to be given the opportunity to be the hands of feet of Jesus.
On that note, that’s where my conviction comes in.

What does it even mean
to be the hands and feet of Jesus? I started thinking hardcore. Praying
hardcore…. begging for a peace about all of this. Instead of a peace, I
became more confused. Then BAM this is where the conviction came over me. I
could hear God almost audibly in my head saying “how on earth are you
supposed to defend your faith if you haven’t even studied it for yourself?”
Ummm excuse me? Conviction.

So with a conviction a
confession must take place huh. I have been alive for 20 years and I have never
just had the desire to study my bible inside and out until now. Yes, I have
read here and there and studied this book and that, flipped here and read a
couple chapters there. You know the typical Christian thing to do. I know the
stories because of what my Sunday school teachers and what bible studies have
studied.. but rarely have I just dug into the word desiring to know my Savior
in the way I am created to. Oh my goodness have I been missing out or what?!
 I have been tearing the new testament uppp and I have been falling more
and more in love with Jesus.. more than I even knew possible. It has been
awesome to be able to connect verses to time periods and just be refreshed on
how baller shot caller our Savior is!

I know this is
probably mind blowing for some of you. What? Ruth doesn’t know her Bible? You
caught me. And God did too.. He is giving me a passion deep in my bones to tear
it apart and comprehend it little by little. Its crazy how much more confidence
I am in my faith now that I am literally hiding His beautiful words in my
heart. It really is sharper than any double edged sword.

Okay so with a
conviction and a confession, I have a challenge for those reading this. It is
so easy to get caught up in the crazy everyday life of getting things done,
going to bed, waking up and doing it again. But for real stop right now and
think about why we even breathe. We are put on this earth for .5 seconds in the
scheme of things TO BRING HONOR TO THE LORD AND MAKE HIM KNOWN.

I am reminded of a
worship song “all of life comes down to just one thing, thats to know you
Oh Jesus and to make You known.”

Not… “All of
life comes down to just a couple things thats to get our stuff done and then
say a little prayer before we go to sleep.”

Or… “all of
life comes down to just one thing thats to wake up do a 15 minute devotion
while i think about what we need to do today.”

nope.. know Him and
make Him known. This is not me preaching, but being passionate about what
the Lord has laid on my heart… passionate about this lifestyle change I am
currently going through.. making my savior number one in my day. Weird, huh? I
feel nauseas thinking I have wasted 20 years of my life. That’s 7300 days. I
mean yeah I understand for the first couple years of that we

aren’t held accountable but lets look at how many hours I have been alive..
175,200 hours. 10,512,000 minutes. If I spent 15 minutes a day for 20 years
spending time with the Lord, that is only 109,500 minutes of my life. 109,500
minutes out of 10,512,000 that I have been graciously given.