[DISCLAIMER: My posts won’t always be this long, I’m just passionate about my testimony and highlighting the evidence and fruits of God’s working hands in and throughout my life! If you’d rather just get to “the list,” feel free to scroll to the end. Otherwise, sit back and maybe grab some coffee! haha]
Defining the “Why”
It’s hard to put into words, let alone concisely articulate in a limited amount of characters for a blog post, exactly what all led to me applying to go on the World Race. With that being said, buckle up and enjoy the ride.
12/12/12, The End of the World (as I knew it)
As the year 2012 wound to a close, and people all over were speculating whether or not the Mayans knew something we didn’t, I was gearing up for my last semester in college with still little to no idea what I might end up doing after. To be honest, I wouldn’t have minded if the world ended that fateful night, December 12th, 2012, it would have kept me from having to figure out what to do with my life! But, unbeknownst to me, the world was about to end. Or, at least, mine was. And I could never have predicted the life that was to come afterward.
The Decision
That fateful December night, after Wednesday services at church and all my friends had turned down my invitation to party like it’s the end of the world (or redbox a movie or at least something to commemorate the occasion), I sat alone in my room thinking about what I could do to mark this date with some sort of significance. Looking back, I guess I really wasn’t alone, and this date now marks a much more momentous event than I ever would have dreamed it would.
With no other lights on but my bedside table lamp and the blue glow of my digital alarm clock, my knees dropped down to my carpeted bedroom floor and I prayed.
“Lord, I give my life to You. You already have it, but I want to recommit to living for You. I give You my future. I have no clue what in the world I’ll end up doing after graduation, but You do. Because of those two things, I want to intentionally step out more on Faith, putting into practice all that I’ve learned and have been preaching my whole life up until now, and make decisions based on my trust in You and not in my own inadequate abilities to have everything worked out before I make them. In the Holy name of Jesus Christ, amen.”
…or something like that.
The main thing is, from that moment moving forward, I wanted to consciously rest in the Peace that came with the Trust required to make decisions based on my Faith in God as the Almighty, Infinite Father Whose will I had aligned my life to and would ultimately be done, anyway. There are only of handful of life-course-determining conscious decisions I can look back and confidently identify having made the right one, and this definitely one of them.
//// Life is a vapor… ////
Life, of course, didn’t change overnight, but I felt a deep Peace start to settle in as I looked towards my future. I became certain of one thing – that I didn’t need to be certain.
I found a verse in James that I latched onto:
13 Look here, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we are going to a certain town and will stay there a year. We will do business there and make a profit.” 14 How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. 15 What you ought to say is, “If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.” 16 Otherwise you are boasting about your own pretentious plans, and all such boasting is evil.
Ha! I had beat the system! I didn’t even have a plan about which to boast!
No, but seriously, this verse reinforced that give-it-to-God and trust-in-Him mindset that’s required from a life lived by Faith. If I’ve claimed to have given my life to God, that needs to be reflected in my plans and thoughts for the future. I may want or choose to do this thing or that, but ultimately it’s up to God whether or not those plans ever come to fruition.
This verse also reminds me how fleeting life is, and how uncertain the future constantly remains, regardless of the best laid plans. Life is a vapor. It’s here for a fleeting moment, then it dissipates into eternity. I ended up getting it tattooed on my forearm (in Greek so I wouldn’t have to commit to a font), and now it’s a constant reminder of the brevity of life, that God is ultimately in control, and to step out more on Faith.
Trial by Fire
After graduating from college May 2013, I moved home for the summer to work but had already made plans to move back down to Tuscaloosa and rent an apartment with some friends in the fall. This, to me, was one of my biggest acts of faith since making my Decision, especially considering I had no job lined up yet and was only mid-way through the application process with a few different police departments in the area. I had a little money saved up from the summer, so I lived off that for a month or two before realizing I couldn’t keep bleeding money. If I didn’t get hired by a department soon, I was going to need to find a job.
My brother and I had worked at a local Which Wich sandwich shop my senior year of college, so as the application and interview process with the police departments dragged on I went back to work there and picked up some hours to staunch my financial bleeding. I’m sure a couple of months of working a register and making sandwiches for people was the perfect catalyst to prime me for what came next.
My best friend and I walked into a recruiter’s office.
I plan (Lord willing) to release a more in-depth post detailing all the twists and turns that took place from this point forward, but for now suffice it to say that it’s been one wild, crazy ride to say the least! The main thing here, though, was my mindset surrounding my decision to ultimately join the military.
Having never seriously considered joining the military before, and after my friend got turned down because of a prior shoulder surgery, I began the process of discerning whether or not joining the military was the right thing for me to do. Some thoughts that went into my decision-making process:
- I wasn’t getting started in a career or trying to settle in to climbing some company ladder.
- I was single with no future prospects for a potential relationship on the horizon, so no family to try to start.
- I was fresh out of college, young, and in (at the time) the best shape I had ever been in up to that point.
- I wanted to test myself mentally, physically, and spiritually to determine whether or not I was really up to snuff.
Up until now, I had fared fairly well in school, only ever been challenged physically by basketball conditioning in high school, and even though I attended a state university had never taken more than a step or two outside of my close circles of Christian friends.
The thought that truly sealed the deal and caused me to seriously commit to praying about heading in that direction was the idea of the opportunity to live out and do what I had heard preached about since infancy and “be a light to the world.” I figured the military could probably qualify as potentially being a pretty dark place.
I told God my plans to start heading in that direction, but told Him I ultimately surrendered to His plans, and that if He didn’t want me to keep heading in this direction to please frustrate my efforts and make it known. But, if this was indeed what He desired for me and my life, to surround me with Peace through the process so that I may go boldly forward knowing He was with me and had blessed me.
Long story short, I felt complete and total peace about my decision to join from that first day of consideration all the way til now as you read this, and I will continue confidently knowing that was exactly what I needed to do.
If you would’ve told younger me, even months earlier, that he would be considering the military, let alone ultimately joining, I doubt he would’ve believed you. But now, older me thanks God for the unlikely circumstances in which I’ve found myself all in order to draw me more closely to Him.
Dude, wrap it up!
Alright, alright, I know, this is getting super long-winded, but like the disclaimer said at the beginning, I get super pumped up and carried away about sharing my testimony and wanting to show the faithfulness and loving hands of God at work throughout my life!! But I’ll try to wrap it up for now.
Since separating from the military, I’ve worked my way through a year of a two-year grad school program in mental health. Like joining the military, I decided to pursue this route through much prayer and trust in God’s prompting and direction. Also like the military, this program has pushed me to grow in ways I probably wouldn’t have otherwise, and has led me that much further into a deeper faith and appreciation for God and what He’s done and continues to do in my life.
Well, here we are again. Not many days removed from deciding to join the World Race after spending 40 days immersed back in that life-changing-decision making prayerful discernment process I first implemented six long/short years ago. Here are the reasons I ultimately did:
- To see and soak in as much of God’s beautiful creation as I can.
- To connect with people from different walks of life and add to my perspective of the human experience.
- As an outlet for the testimony burning inside me yearning to be unleashed.
- To continue leaning into and building on the trust that I’ve cultivated around God’s provision and His faithfulness.
- To go into all the world and preach the Good News to everyone.
- To allow the Holy Spirit to work in and on and through me and my life.
- To be God’s conduit to His creation.
- To reflect Jesus and spread His love, joy, and kingdom here on this earth.
- To continue growing and stretching my faith in ways I never thought possible or imaginable.
I see this as the next progressive step for my faith and my life. From a more typical Church of Christ to a more progressive one for the area, to a state college and then to the military, and now being a part of a mental health program that has challenged me in still new ways and expanded my mind that much further, I see the World Race as the natural progression to my faith’s evolution. Every stage of my faith’s journey has built on the foundations laid by the ones before it. I’m primed and ready to grow even more, continuing on into eternity. Open the eyes of my heart, Lord. Send me. I’ll go.
Fin
Phew! That got a little long, I know. In my defense, I did give you a heads up from the get-go! That being said, I’m so glad you took the time to read all this and hope you found it worth your while. I wanted to give as much insight into my decision as I could and I hope now you feel you know and understand me a little bit more. I’m excited to be on this journey and have you along for the ride! If you believe in me, or more specifically in the work God is doing with me, please consider donating either to my fundraising goals or a spot for me and my squad on your prayer list. I would love for you to partner with us in some way, but only if you feel called!
Thank you so much for all your support. Until next time!
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