I’ve brought this up before, but identity is just where the Lord has me right now. So that is what I am going to write about.
I love psychology, and so personality tests are a favorite! In meyers briggs I am the INFP. Here’s a small description of that-
INFPs are creative, quirky, humane, and individualistic. Like INFJs, they want to understand who they are and their purpose in the world. Curious and restless, they enjoy entertaining new ideas and possibilities. They are rarely content with “what is,” preferring instead to focus their sights on “what could be.”
INFPs never seem to lose their sense of wonder. One might say they see life through rose-colored glasses. It’s as though they live at the edge of a looking-glass world where mundane objects come to life, where flora and fauna take on near-human qualities.
Their curiosity about the world, including its potential role in clarifying their identity, can inspire INFPs to travel or adopt a peripatetic lifestyle. They may, for instance, choose to explore other cultures, live out of a vehicle, or take to the woods. As long as these sorts of explorations feel stimulating and life-giving, INFPs will continue to explore them, even amid pressures to embrace a more conventional path.
INFPs seek a life of passion and intensity. They want to know what it means to be fully alive and how they might cultivate a rich and abundant life. They gravitate toward experiences that arouse or intensify feelings of passion, inspiration, or meaning. They may turn to relationships, novels, poetry, music, travel, or activism to achieve their desired level of intensity.
I love the arts, in all forms. I love adventure, and the beauty in nature. I love listening to peoples stories. I love change, and have a restless spirit. I like pushing the boundaries of what people say that I can or can’t do. But I also felt guilty for liking all of these things, and that this was who I was.
This year the Lord has begun to show me that He created me this way for a purpose, and that it was good. It even says so in scripture.
There would be a day that he was going to call me to become a missionary, and travel the world. He was so kind to instill these passions in me for such a calling on my life. I was not meant to work in an office. Nor to want the american dream. God knew what he was doing. And so little by little I have begun to understand more about myself and what he says about me, as a child of God. I am letting go of the shame that I have lived in. It’s a process, but a good one. He’s assured me that he is trustworthy, and a safe place.
Something that he keeps bringing back to mind is the image of an open space. One of my earliest memories feeling the Lord’s presence (even before I knew him personally) was on a missions trip in Bolivia. We were just outside of a city tucked away in the mountains, and it was early morning. Our team was helping to build a church, and so we made our way to the construction site. We walked through a rolling valley, filled with breathtaking wildflowers and mist that blanketed the ground. You could see the sun coming up over the mountains. Since then he has used this image of an open space(valley) and mist to become ‘our spot’. I love that about him. He’s so personal, and cares so much for his craft of me, and you. We are his masterpieces, That he loves so so much.
I have an original photo of that morning somewhere, but here are two to get a feel for what it looked like.
