After hearing about the World Race my plan was to apply for the January 2012 race. The deadline to apply was in October. The application consisted of a lot of information you have to fill out, questions you have to answer, personality tests, etc. so I was taking my time because it was currently June and I had until October. One night I had a dream of a girl whom I didn’t know personally but knew of, whose mother told me she went on the race (the reason I originally looked into the trip). In the dream I went up to the girl and told her that I was planning on going on the trip. She asked if I had applied and I said I hadn’t yet because I had until October. She told me that I don’t have until October and that I need to go now and submit my application. The next day I logged onto my profile to find that the January 2012 race was full. I saw there was a 2nd trip so I quickly finished filling out my application and submitted it. Crazy huh?
Once I applied for the January2012 2 race and got accepted, I started doing what I was supposed to do to get ready for it: send out support letters, get my vaccines, purchase international insurance, passport, save money like crazy, put my car up for sale, read previous racers blogs, try to figure out the gear I need, etc.
One of the blogs I was supposed to write after I got accepted was about how I was called to the mission field, what moved me to apply for a trip like this. Each time I sat down to write it I would pray that God would help me to write it because I didn’t exactly know the answer. I probably have about 10 rough drafts for this blog and they each go in different directions. I got frustrated and quit each time simply because I didn’t know the answer to that question.
I told God from the beginning that I didn’t want to go anywhere that He wasn’t and that if He wants me to go on this trip that I know He will make a way. I know it is God Who has called me on this race as in the World Race, but which trip in particular wasn’t clear until just recently, before the deadline and before training camp, thank God! It was confirmed many times that I am to go on the World Race, and after the dream I figured I was applying for the race I was supposed to go on because the other one was obviously full and they had opened a 2nd one. Makes sense right?
In all honesty i didn’t really care if I went on the trip or not. I was excited because it’s an amazing opportunity, but each time I thought about leaving in January all I could think is how I really don’t even want to go. I didn’t know what was wrong with me because my desire has always been to travel and spread the love of Christ. Maybe I just didn’t want to fundraise, was afraid to ask people for money, or something. I didn’t really know. I was acting like I was excited, tried making myself excited … I mean 11 months with God being led by Him, what could be better??? I ignored the way I felt because I was convinced God wanted me to go. As long as I was right where He wants me, I would be excited.
I wanted to make sure that He was with me every step of the way so almost every day I would ask Him to confirm again that He wants me to go on this trip. Without fail, whether through a devotional, a friend, a prophetic word, a sermon at church, or a dream, He made it clear every time. But then came September.
I’m a month away from my October deadline, need $3,500 in my account by October 2nd and no money is coming in. I’m certain that God will provide, I’m sending out letters like crazy, Still asking God to keep reminding me that He wants me to go on this trip. Suddenly confirmations ceased, no sign, no word.
After a week He still isn’t giving me a sign that He is still with me in this.
God??? Where Ya at? Did I make a wrong turn? I am still supposed to go on this trip correct?
I’m trusting You!
2 weeks … Nothing.
God! I DONT WANT TO GO IF YOURE NOT WITH ME!!!!! IF YOU DON’T WANT ME TO GO MAKE IT CLEAR AND STOP THE PROCESS!!!
I prayed this but was expecting Him to tell me He didn’t want me to go if He didn’t. I told Him that if He doesn’t want me to go that I don’t want anyone putting money in my account because they wont be able to get it back but I don’t want to tell them not to because what if You’re going to do one of those last minute deals where the money just appears in my account the day of the deadline?
Even though I prayed no money would come in, each time I checked my account and no money was in it I was upset.
I kept reminding Him that I trust Him no matter what happens.
3 weeks … umm, oh, I think I hear something … yup, He starts speaking to me about this and that, and Oh Sweet that’s a cool revelation. He starts speaking like craaazy about all this stuff. So I ask Him about my trip. . .
He doesn’t say a single word!!!!!
Come on God!
2 weeks to the deadline, slowly but surely I start to panic!
No moneys coming in and everyone who responds to my letter is asking me to pray for their finances. So Iv’e got this long list of people to pray for for money; telling them I know God will provide for me and that He will do the same for you.
Still no money, bills start coming in. The previous week was the last week at my job, so i’m jobless.
I talk to my mobilizer on Monday the 26th of September, shes wondering whats going on and if I’m fundraising because theres no money in my account and I need $3,500 in 6 days. I explained what was going on and she suggested that I switch to one of the July races. I told her that I think God wants me on this race and asked if I could wait til Sunday to see if He provides and if not then I will talk to her about switching.
So I got off the phone, discouraged and almost in tears, asking God what’s up?
He must not wanna talk to me.
… but God, no matter what, I trust You!
The next day I was thinking about whether I should switch to the July race or not and it was the strangest thing but I had this amazing peace each time I thought about it. It actually made me angry because I was planning on going in January, I was to leave for training camp in 3 weeks! All the plans were set; I just needed the money. I refused to believe that God was trying to tell me that He wanted me to switch races and that, that was the reason He stopped confirming that I was to go in January.
I told Him angrily that I liked the places that the January2012 2 trip is going to and the only way I would want to switch is if I would be able to go to Ireland (the 1 place I desire to go to most in the world. Growing up I would always ask God to send me to Ireland so I could witness to the people in the pubs).
But the World Race wouldn’t go to a place like Ireland. I didn’t see it as a place on any of the other trips I looked at. In my mind it just wouldn’t make sense. I just knew they wouldn’t send us to a place like Ireland.
But I decided to check to see the places the July races were going to. Maybe one of the routes would be similar to mine.
I looked at the July 1 race, it was kinda similar. But I DID NOT WANT TO WAIT TIL JULY!!!
The July 2 race wasn’t similar to mine at all and I didn’t want to go to any of the places.
The July 3 race: I read down the list of countries: Ireland, Ukraine, Russia, Kenya …
… WAIT! WHAT?!?!?!???
So I’m thinking, God You’re funny! But wait, are You really wanting me to switch races, I just ordered my tent??? Although I didn’t/don’t want to wait til July I reminded Him (and myself) that I don’t want to be or go anywhere He doesn’t want me. So I asked Him to start confirming it if He wants me to go in July.
- Confirmation about Ireland.
- When I mentioned going in July to mother, she told me that I’m supposed to go in July. She said as soon as I said it she got this crazy peace about me going which she didn’t have before.
- 2 random people within the next 2 days told me that they know Im supposed to go on the World Race but wasn’t supposed to go in January.
-
I began to remember different things like:
- A few days prior, my mother told me that she thinks I’m supposed to go on the World Race but she doesn’t think God’s plan is for me to go in January. She kept saying this and it made me sad.
- A month ago my friend’s dad said he was praying about me going in January and said he doesn’t feel like I’m supposed to go and told me to keep praying about it. I forgot he said that until now.
- Even little prayers I prayed that if I go in July they would be answered:
-
- My cousin’s wedding is in October (I would have been at training camp and unable to make it). I begged God to make a way for me to go.
- Conference in Missouri I want to go to with my sister at the end of December into January that I would not be able to go to because of the January Race.
- Missions trip to El Salvador that I want to go to with my church in March (Sunday the 2nd is the deadline for me to sign up for the El Salvador trip which is also the day I would know if I’m going on the January Race or not).
- A project that my friend is working on that I feel like I’m supposed to be involved with but would not be able to because of the Race.
- And more!!!
Wednesday I believe I found out why the January 1 Race filled up before I submitted my application, and why I applied for the January 2 Race instead of originally applying for the one in July. On Wednesday the 28th I met with a girl who also lives in Michigan who is planning on going on the January 2 race. I wont go into detail because this blog is long enough already, but I know for a fact that I was supposed to meet her and I believe, God being AWESOME, that I had the dream so that I would apply for this race, and that He was silent because I was supposed to meet this girl.
I wrote this blog on 9.30.11, when God made it clear that He wants me on the July race, 2 days before I would know if I were to go on the January race, but I’m just now posting it.
So, I will be going to Ireland in July and will have the opportunity to tell the people in the pubs about Jesus, and I am SOOOOOOO EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙂
