Where to begin? My mind thinks back to when I initially discovered this amazing, super, adventure-packed mission trip. I was an intern at Rescue Her, a local anti-human trafficking organization in Dallas. Another intern pulled up the website and introduced me to the world race. This jam-packed 11 months in 11 different countries seemed incredible but completely farfetched for me and “my life plans.” The funny thing is, It is not my life that I am living. I was placed here to worship, serve and love Jesus. This means that I am to be a disciple of Christ.
Over the past five or so years I never really grasped that concept. It wasn’t until I graduated college that, what seemed like a shield over my eyes was lifted and I could see. As impulsive as I tend to be when I get hopped up on Jesus juice, I applied to the World Race. Soon after however, fear, doubt and “real life” began to creep into my mind. The practicality of going overseas for a year seemed out of reach. The assurance I found in my decision was blinded by a lack of trust in God that I believe everyone struggles with. So, I withdrew my application and settled for two weeks to Thailand and Cambodia.
It is impossible to explain in words how those two weeks changed my life. I felt the presence of God in the middle of brothels and trash-ridden streets. I had so little to call my own, but I wasn’t poor, I didn’t want for nothing. My heart was full. Upon my return from this trip, I realized I was missing part of myself and had found it through serving as Christ did.
Time passed and my heart was unsettled in my “American” way of life. I would see homeless and think of ways I could aid them, look online at local organizations to find ways to volunteer, search for short-term mission trips and new jobs that worked with trafficking victims, only to become more discouraged than before.
I finally, with a deep breath and sigh, gave my future over to God. I prayed, “Where you want me to go, I will go. What you want me to do, I will do. I am terrified, but I know, no matter what, you are with me. Give me direction” At that moment I heard him clearly say “Go on the world race, NOW.” This wasn’t an audible, booming, manly-man voice. This was a warmth that flooded my heart and a thought that provided more comfort than any hug.
Trust. I am trusting God with his plan for me. I am scared. I am excited. I am a mess of emotions. The trust is what gives me peace. How can I go wrong when I am literally handing my entirety over to the one who created me! Thus, off I go in August to see what God has in store for me and those I encounter. I just hope people don’t think I’m crazy. Or maybe I want them to think I am.
Radically shifting my life to follow my God. What kind of person does that? The kind that knows this world is only temporary. The one who wants to bring as many people as she can to know Christ Jesus so we can spend eternity with him! Call me crazy, but that sounds amazing.
