God & I… we've been tight since I was like, 14. At the end of (most) every day I'd strike up a convo –
Oh hey, it's me again… yeah, it was a great day, thanks SO MUCH for the blessings, God You're awesome and full of mercy, and I love you! But a few things I could REALLY use your help on…
Since those days I’ve matured and grown spiritually. Still… I had this feeling that I was barely scratching the surface.
And so earlier this year I started praying this:
I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so somehow, attain the resurrection from the dead. – Phil 3:10-11
I want to KNOW Christ.
I want to know the POWER of his resurrection.
So I prayed. And I got scared. Do I really want to see that power? What might that be? What might I encounter? I might be getting myself in a little deep here. And does God still work like He used to? It sure seems like He's calmed down lately…
And then I got to training camp.
And there was all this talk about the Holy Spirit. Cool, I like that – I mean, He lives in me, right? I can deal. And they told us that scripture says God is the same yesterday, today and forever. Yep, I believe that too. Awesome. We're all on the same page.
And then, on the very first night they said we would be living out the same authority Jesus gave his disciples in Matthew 10. And that as we went into the nations WE would do what Jesus said to do in verse 8 – we'd "heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers and drive out demons." Oh, sweet.
Wait… What?
Ok, technically speaking, CAN God heal people and raise the dead? Sure, He's GOD. But DOES He do those things? Really? Now? Still? I never hear about it. But… He tells me that He's the same always. Interesting…
I went about my business, absolutely LOVING every minute – the dance parties, the worship, bonding with my squad, the talks about finding our true identities in Christ and walking in freedom… man, it was good! Even the fact that I was in a heavy duty ankle brace due to 6 months of severe tendonitis and had to limit my physical activity couldn't damper my soaring spirit!
And then it happened. We discussed the power of the Holy Spirit in detail. Wowza. And invited Him to reveal Himself to us in new ways. Whew. And as I was singing and praying, I heard a whisper ,
"Remove your ankle brace."
Huh? I looked around, kept singing.
Crap, there it was again,
"Remove it."
Keeeppppppt siiiiiiinnnnnngggggiiiiinnngggg.
"Renee…"
"Ok, God, really? Is this the best time? Shouldn't I ease into this? I'm going to be on my feet all day, every day, standing on concrete and carrying my pack around! I can't afford to make my ankle worse right now and…"
"I won't heal you if you don't give me a chance to heal you."
I stopped singing. Stopped moving. Stopped talking. Stopped thinking.
And I trusted that the God who was speaking to me in that moment was the SAME GOD who parted the Red Sea for His people. Who made the sun stand still so that Joshua could lead Israel in battle. Who gave the disciples the authority to heal & raise the dead & drive out demons.
He. Is. The. Same.
So I took off my ankle brace.
And God healed me.
Wait… He did whaaaattttt?
Yep. I have no explanation. But that night I danced and jumped in worship like I never have in my life. Since then I've run and leapt and biked and walked… and I haven't put my brace back on. I'm learning what it means to trust and walk in healing, but one step at a time, I'm walking.
Crazy? I know… that's what I said too.
Stay tuned. I think things are about to get reeealllyyyyy interesting.
