I was leaving behind a job doing what I loved: training, coaching and mentoring college-aged leaders. It was the kind of job that people just don't get when they're in their twenties and still figuring out their life. But somehow, I did. And I loved it. But after five years, the Lord whispered that He had something more for me, and that it was in the nations. He was sending me out. And so I went.
And suddenly I was surrounded by all of these people who had big dreams – dreams that seemed bigger than anything I had ever considered dreaming before. And their dreams were all based on one big thing in the world that broke their hearts. They were “Kingdom Dreams.” Stacey wanted to end human trafficking. Brian wanted to start an orphanage. Thomas wanted to take street kids back to innocence.
And all of a sudden, I felt kind of behind in the game.
Where is my dream, Lord?
What is my ‘one thing’ that's going to wreck my heart?
Is it orphans? Is it poverty? Is it human trafficking? Show me, God!
And so I began to hope and pray that as I traveled the world, God would give me a dream. And that He would make it really clear to me which issue was "mine." What need I would be wrecked by so I could help fight it.
Well, God didn't exactly show up in that hope like I expected Him to. Don't get me wrong, I was broken all right. I continually witnessed things that wrecked my heart for the world’s people. But even when my heart was broken, I couldn't seem to find my ‘one thing.’ The thing that fired me up. That made me feel alive when I rose up against it. And I was getting frustrated.
Where was my Kingdom Dream?!
After months of this, something happened. I was asked to step into a position of leadership on the race. I said yes. And the next day, on a cramped, dirty bus, the Lord met me. And reminded me.
You want a passion? A dream?
Look in your heart. You have one. I’ve already given it to you.
And I couldn’t help but laugh. Because it was true. There were dreams and passions in my heart that I had buried on the race because I thought that because they didn’t look like other people’s they weren’t good enough. And I also started believing that I wasn’t good enough to pursue them. What a deadly combination of lies! Your dreams aren’t good enough, and even if they were, you’re not good enough for them. Gross.
But on that bus ride, the Lord removed those lies from my heart and began to restore and reaffirm the dreams and the desires He had given me long ago. Ones that I’d been walking in for years. And even better, He began to show me how He had developed them, matured them, and added to them while I’d been on the race.
Of developing people. And discipling people.
I love to see greatness in others, call it out, and see them walk into it.
I always have.
On the race, the Lord spent a lot of time doing some stuff in my heart that deepened that desire. That refined me. That developed my voice for speaking into people and developed my eyes for seeing what the Lord sees in others.
That’s my one thing.
And when that happens, we begin to walk in the destiny and the purpose that’s on our lives. We begin to change the environments around us and impact the needs that break our hearts.
So that’s my Kingdom Dream.
The Lord is growing it and showing me some ideas of what it could look like long term and big picture.
In January, I will be squad leading for the World Race!
It’s my heart. It’s the first step of walking in my Kingdom Dream. I can’t wait.
