It is safe to say that India was not the easiest month for me. While the ministry at Sarahs’s Covenant Homes was amazing, the rest of the experience was, for lack of a better word, draining.
My best buddy, Eleanor, was the cutest thing EVER! She stole my heart the moment she looked up at me with her gigantic brown eyes and smile that swept across her entire face. I am not sure that any of you have ever experienced the love of someone who has nothing to offer in return, but it is enough to make a grown man weep. She looked at me and literally saw right into my soul. I immediately sang her the coveted “snuggle” song, and I knew she would be my best buddy this month. (if you do not know the coveted “snuggle” song, it is because you are not my mom, sister or niece. You can make up your own, or ask one of us to sing it to you). I don’t ever think I will be able to get her face out of my head. Ever.
This is how she looked at me… all the time.
Look at those eyes!!!
All the other kids at SCH were amazing as well and don’t forget their amazing foster moms, Carrie and Abby. The kids are pure joy and the mom’s pour out pure love. I am encouraged by their strength and determination to persevere in a hardened country.
Now, let’s get real for a moment. This was all squad month. This means that 44 people shared a living space, showers, bathrooms, movies, clothing, toiletries aaaaaand personal space. There were 3 rooms holding 35 women. We shared 2 showers, 2 toilets and 2 sinks. As you can imagine things got a little hectic with our every-other day shower schedule and miscellaneous bathroom needs. Tag that alongside weak wifi, physically draining ministry days, and lack of sleep due to heat and cement floors + sleeping pad, and you have yourself 35 very excited women (sense the sarcasm).
In case you didn’t know, Indian cuisine is rice and curry based. Apparently, my body rejects this way of living. I ended up getting pretty ill the first and last week of ministry and ended up missing a total of 6 ministry days. I am not sure I have ever felt so physically and emotionally weak in my entire life. To be quite honest, I was incredibly frustrated at myself for not being able to grab myself by boot straps and continue on. Luckily my team is so encouraging and several other squad mates came to my rescue and nursed by back to 100%. So for a good chunk of our time in India, I felt pretty useless.
The good news is God doesn’t stop moving when I am sick. He actually doesn’t even need me. But, yet He still chooses to use my weak, feeble, diminishing, measly body to tell others about His love. I may have felt useless, but I was still used. I may have felt weak, but I was still strong. I may have felt overwhelmed, but I was still at peace. Where do you feel sub-par? God will still use you. Where do you feel lonely? God still wants you.
India is a country in desperate need of the gospel and I was privelaged to be a very tiny tool in bringing it. The landscape is beautiful, the colors are breath taking and the people are vibrant. My word for the month: perseverance.
