that’s the word that’s been playing itself on repeat in my head this last week. release. so, i’m scared about the implications, but God is going to hold me up. i’m moving. and we’re not just talking 5 miles down the street from my parents’ house, or even 50 miles for that matter. no, i’m heading out to colorado springs, co.
now some of you might be thinking “it’s about time” while others of you are scratching your heads and trying to figure out if i meant caledonia instead…but really, my response is: yes, it’s time, and i did say “colorado.”
this has actually been a long time coming (like, i’ve been contemplating it since africa…), but for the last six months i’ve felt a sense of obligation/duty to stay near my family and in the area in which i grew up (gotta love west michigan!), and now i feel released to head out to colorado and get a fresh start. why now? why not right after i came home from the race? why not wait another few months? God’s timing is perfect, and a couple things have happened recently that helped me know it’s okay to move on and move out.
first, my job situation. or lack thereof. i’m not doing something i enjoy all that much (i mean, who doesn’t want to work retail after they’ve graduated from college with a nursing degree?), i’m not really making enough money to live off from, and i have four years of blood, sweat, and tears into a degree and license that i’m not using. michigan isn’t looking too promising on the job market (even in nursing, surprise surprise), and things are looking worse in that area every day where i live. so i’m hoping for a nursing job. or somewhere i can use my skills and training as a nurse to positively affect the lives of other people.
secondly, Christmas is over, and people have settled back down in to “normal” again. selfishly, i wanted to be with my immediate family over Christmas and knew that if i had moved sooner and had gotten a job that i probably wouldn’t have been able to spend that time with them. so we headed down to florida as a family and spent one last Christmas all together before we “kids” get too grown-up to do so.
third, i had a “goodbye/hello/goodbye/hello” kind of week last week. a close friend’s grandmother passed away after a short battle with cancer, and though i love being around my friend and felt called to stay and support her through this time of trial, i’ve felt released from the major supporter/comforter/pray-er role i’ve had the last two months. my uncle got married to a wonderful Haitian woman, and their wedding sermon was about reconciliation (2 Cor 5) – it just kind of struck a chord with me…can’t really explain this in a quick way. then a close friend of mine who is serving in asia left for another two years there (she was home for about 2 months over Christmas) – i was able to spend some time with her, sharing stories and catching up on the last couple years of our lives, before she headed back overseas. finally, a good friend of one of my sisters made profession of faith at my parents’ church (it’s kind of like adult baptism, without the baptism part…becoming a member of the church. anyway…), and since my sisters had just left for college less than a week before that, i was able to be around to congratulate and encourage and support her. i’ve also been talking with my parents about moving and money a lot since returning home from the race – i came home about on empty financially – and they’ve been warming up to the idea of me moving as well as realizing that i’ll be able to take care of myself (i’m the oldest girl in my family, so they can be somewhat protective…love you mom and dad!)
and arcing over all of this, over all the different circumstances and events that have taken place in my life the last few months, God has been whispering “it’s time.” still and quiet, yet persistently, He is nudging me toward greatness one little whispered word at a time.
i’ve struggled since returning home. a lot. with a lot of different things…especially being able to hear God’s voice over all the other ones that clammer form my attention. but He has remained faithful, and as He whispers “come” and “it’s time” in my ear, i’m ready to listen and i’m ready to go. and i’m ready to see what crazy things God has in store for me in Colorado.
how can you support me in this journey? pray for me! pray for smooth transitions, safe travel, and for job/ministry opportunities to open up so i can hit the ground running in colorado. pray for my family i’ll be leaving here (and visiting in iowa on the way, or so they tell me) and for the community of friends i’ll be joining in to out there. pray for wisdom in the decisions i’ll be making and for discernment to know what things are from God and what are not. and follow along with my story. yes, there is internet in colorado (and i’m pretty sure it’s even faster than a lot of the other places i’ve traveled to in the last year+), and yes, i do intend to keep blogging so that those of you who’ve been following me will be able to keep updated on life’s happenings out there.
