Hello All!
I opened the floor for questions a very long time ago and here they are, complete with my responses. If you have any more questions feel free to contact me here. I’m always open to talk.
- What have I been doing so far?
My team has partnered with a different ministry every month and we basically just do whatever they ask of us. The majority of my time has been spent doing various kinds of manual labor (building a soccer field, fixing up houses, landscape cleanup) and spending time with kids (teaching or generally just having fun). Panama was the one month that was a little different. We did house visits, teaching, outreach like inviting people to events and helping create relationships within the surrounding Indian community there. It all involves lots of flexibility and an open mind.
- What has been easier than I anticipated?
Finding Sensodyne toothpaste and becoming comfortable.
- What has been harder than I imagined?
Initiating conversation with strangers. Once the first words have been spoken I’m more than okay, but it’s not as easy as I thought to say “Hello, what’s your name.”
- What do I miss the most?
I miss couches and silence. I miss being alone. I miss riding my bike, my thinking chairs, and all my people at home. Hard to narrow that one down.
- What do I not miss that I was sure I would?
For the first 4 ½ months: Home. I missed people, but it wasn’t until month 5 that I felt actual homesickness. It was the thought of missing out on living life with people. I also miss the ease of things. Regular everyday things become exhausting when you’re fighting the language barrier and general ignorance of the lay of the land.
- What has been your biggest spiritual breakthrough?
The latest one always feels like the biggest. The latest breakthrough:
I don’t need anyone else to understand my convictions, believe me when I tell them the sky is falling or get excited with me about what the Lord is doing. It’s nice when others come along for the ride, but if they don’t it doesn’t have to limit me and it won’t determine what success looks like for me as long as I’m doing what I know I should. This whole thing (the Race and beyond) is absolutely my journey with God and lots of people are going to be affected positively if I do what I’m being called to, but I’m not dependent on seeing them succeed to know that I have.
- What is your biggest spiritual struggle?
Letting go of my deep and sometimes almost imperceptible biases toward God and other Christians. This continues to take different forms as I discover new places in my life that have been poisoned by fear, anger and mistrust.
- How can you be shouldering this journey with me better?
I don’t want to be protected. I want to know what’s happening at home. So if there’s something you would have shared with me under normal circumstances, don’t keep it from me now. I want to be told if you’re happy or sad or struggling or even if you’re upset with me. I may not be very good about getting back to you in a timely manner, but that doesn’t mean I don’t need to hear from you or that I don’t appreciate it. I’m still me. I’m still here. I still care about you all more than I can express.
And of course, pray.
Thanks to everyone who asked a question! You’re all lovely people!
