There is something that happens when people you care about deeply are in a dangerous situation. There’s something that happens to your heart, your mind, your physical body even. I ached to know that Greg, Brandi, and everyone else inside would be safe, that they’d be ok.
And I loved my teammates more deeply in those moments than I thought I ever could.
At some point, after we had someone call the police and had tried to explain to the small crowd that had gathered what was going on inside the hotel, the four of us circled up and prayed. I can’t remember the words I said to the Lord, but it didn’t matter. It calmed my heart enough so that I could think a little clearer.
Shortly after I said “amen” Andrew walked out the front door of the hotel.
We ran.
Fast.
When we finally stopped at a relatively safe distance from the hotel, Andrew was gone. He’d run the other way…and was later arrested.
When I saw Greg walk outside looking for us, we started walking back. This was when I became aware of two things: I was barefoot, and my whole body was shaking. But those things didn’t matter much; Greg was ok. Where was Brandi? I had to find her next…had to see her with my own eyes and know that she was ok too. I walked into the hotel and saw her, gave her a hug, and finally began to wind down.
Everyone was present and accounted for. Everyone was safe.
It might make me sound extremely shallow, but this was honestly the first night that I realized I loved my team.
Really loved them.
I wanted them to be safe more than anything else and my prayers to God never ceased in the short time when I had no idea what was happening inside the building. It was all I knew to do. It was torture waiting and not knowing what would happen as the seconds ticked by. The prayers I spoke to the Lord from my heart might’ve been incoherent to anyone else…incoherent, unintelligible streams of words – but as they poured from my heart I knew with a deep sense of peace that God was listening. He was responding…He was with us.
And that night, as we were all safely in rooms for the night with an armed guard stationed at the door, I looked back on the day and talked with God about how things might’ve gone. I saw a glimpse of how much He’d been taking care of us. I fully believe that God kept Andrew from pulling the trigger, and kept him from hurting himself or hurting someone else.
God is good – He is so good. And he hears our prayers…He SEES us, and knows what we need and is with us through everything we go through. Whether it’s the big things or the little things; the friendly situations or the unfriendly, HE IS OUR EVER-PRESENT Savior and deliverer.
I hope that you pull some encouragement from this blog. I am posting it not to scare you or to worry you…but to reassure you that YOUR prayers for our safety are not bouncing off heaven’s gates unheard by the ears of God. I’m posting this to remind you of a simple truth that has been my oxygen the last 4 months:
You are not alone.
Grace and peace to you (whoever “you” might be!)
