Yesterday we arrived in Johannesburg to begin our new ministry for the next 6 weeks. The base here is beautiful and the Lord has truly blessed us with the amazing staff. Ministry this month looks a lot different than anything I’ve ever done before, and today we got our very first taste of this new challenge.
Today we loaded up into a van with only our bibles and water bottles in hand, and drove to a squatter camp outside of the city. A squatter camp is a place where immigrants from nearby countries can live when they have no where else to go or can’t afford to buy homes. We were split into groups of three people and a translator, and wandered deep into this community that can best be described as rows upon rows of little tin shacks. I had never really evangelized before, and my mind was going a million miles a minute trying to figure out what I was going to say to these people, and why I was even there, because I felt like the world’s least qualified person for the job. Then I remembered that in my quiet time that morning I had written a letter to Jesus, just like I do every day, but had shoved this one into the pages of my Bible to carry with me. As we were walking that dirt road through the community, I opened my Bible and read the letter quietly to myself. Here’s what it said:
Dear Jesus,
Today I am yours. Remind me that I don’t have to have all the right words, and I don’t need to have all the answers.
“For everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved. But how can they call on him to save them unless they believe in him? And how can they believe in him if they have never heard about him? And how can they hear about him unless someone tells them? And how will anyone go and tell them without being sent?” (Romans? ?10:13-15?)
I HAVE BEEN SENT to bring the good news of the gospel, whether or not I feel qualified. I have been sent to tell others about You, so that they can hear, believe, and build a relationship with You in order to attain salvation. And how that salvation happens Lord, I’m still not completely sure. Its something I probably will never understand. But no matter what is true, and no matter how long it takes for me to figure it out, I am still a vessel to bring Your love to these people who so desperately need it. They need to hear the good news so they can believe it. So maybe today we will be planting seeds in someones heart for the first time. Maybe we will be watering seeds, helping someone build a relationship with You that has already been planted in their hearts. Or maybe, just MAYBE, we will see fruit… maybe we will see people give their lives to You Jesus. May the words come from You today. I pray that you will be my strength and confidence when I doubt that this is where I’m meant to be. Lord, today I am your vessel. Today I am Yours.
Today was hard and so outside of my comfort zone, but it was insanely eye opening. There are people out there who thirst for more of the Lord, and who want nothing more than to sit down with those weird looking Americans, inviting us into their homes to hear us share the Word of God and allowing us to help wherever we can. Sometimes that helping means simply doing dishes or laundry, but apparently sometimes that means helping the woman on the corner clean out chicken intestines to sell… yes, you heard that right, using your bare hands to squish out you know what from a bucket full of intestines. (The things we do to make Jesus’ name known…)
There are also people who want nothing to do with us and our message, and rejection isn’t fun, but as soon as we turn the corner we can still pray for that person anyway. They may not be ready to accept Jesus into their lives but Jesus is ALWAYS ready and willing to work. Both of these types of interactions are equally important.
After only one day of this ministry, I was overwhelmed. In fact, by lunch time I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to keep going. When people ask you questions you’ve never been asked, you’re forced to explore your own beliefs like you’ve never had to before. Getting back to the base today, the only thing I wanted to do was sit and read my Bible for hours. I want nothing more than to dig deeper and learn more, so that I have more to share in the community tomorrow and for our next six weeks here. It’s going to be HARD, and each and every day will bring it’s own challenges and frustrations. This is probably going to be the most stretching and difficult thing I’ve ever done, but I know that within that, the Lord is going to work and show up like never before. Please continue praying for my team and I, that we will continue to have open hearts to conversations and opportunities that stretch us. In the crushing and the pressing, we are refined and enter deeper into relationship with Him, and I am so excited and expectant for the ways the Lord will refine my heart and strengthen my faith through this ministry.
Thank you for continuing to follow my journey through these blogs, I really appreciate everyone who sticks with me through all of my word vomit 🙂 Here’s to new challenges and eye-opening experiences!
-Reagan
