Last weekend my team had a unique opportunity to participate in a training that YWAM offers to their Discipleship Training School students. While I am not allowed to go into detail about this training because it would ruin the experience for future teams, I am excited to share with you how God moved! This opportunity was founded on leadership, team work, and renouncing our rights.
We were given a specific limited packing list, with no explanation as to why items were allowed or not allowed (mainly no change of clothes). The only information we were given was: We will be evangelizing in the city and return in 3 days. Already my mind was overflowing with questions and craving to know the logic behind the instructions. The weekend’s theme when a question was presented to the YWAM leaders was to ask our team leader who generally had the response ‘I don’t know’. This was frustrating because while I believed there was a great purpose to this opportunity I was not given specific answers. We were given information moment by moment with the time frames being unknown. We did not know where we would sleep, who we would be working with, what events we would participate in, what we would eat, or when we’d be able to find a bathroom. We were not allowed to use personal money to acquire any “comforts.” This opportunity incredibly stretched my understanding of truly trusting God and helped me begin the process of renouncing my rights.
Renounce: (verb) to announce one’s abandonment or giving up of a right to or interest in
I had to renounce my right to be in control- To have all the answers. To time. To food. To hygiene. To rest. Through this experience I learned that God promises us ONE right. In John 1:12 He gives us the right to become Children of God. This statement goes against what the world teaches and even what the USA claims, which is people have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. This weekend definitely had its struggles. For me the unknown, no alone time, and constant initiation of conversations in the community was a struggle and exhausting. While there were moments of rest it was difficult to truly feel at rest when I had no idea what we would be doing next, because I’m used to planning things and having a goal.
1 Peter 2:21
To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps.
We were continually given the opportunity to choose to persevere through struggles. I was stinky, tired, sleeping next to cockroaches, and overwhelmed. While reflecting we were asked what can keep us from allowing God to be LORD in our lives. Is it fear? Fear is the mentality that God isn’t good or able to take care of me. Is it pride? Pride says I want to be God and can do better than Him. Neither is the mentality I desire to have. I came to realize that it was challenging for me to surrender my plans, preferences, alone time, time, rest, comfort, and wants to God. These things were out of my control and I had to find my joy, peace, and rest solely in Jesus. My response when things don’t go my way is generally a negative attitude, feelings of loneliness or defeat, or shut down. I battled these reactions during situations this weekend that called me to completely step out of my comfort zone. Yet God was faithful through it all!
Philippians 2:1-4
Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of others.
Some highlights of how AWESOME our God is…..
- Approached by a group of clowns. Amazing conversation learning about Argentina. Allowed us to accompany them to the children’s hospital. Prayed for the precious children and brought smiles and laughter
- Mission- feed 10 people. Resources- God. We prayed together every corner we came to asking God to direct our steps and provide opportunities to talk to people. We learned to specifically ask in our prayers… Lord please provide us dinner. We learned to encourage each other when we share what the Holy Spirit tells us. We learned the value of intercession and power of prayer. We lived out the verse, “Cast all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you.”
- God is faithful. He abundantly provided food for us… two and a half pizzas, soda, cookies, gummies, assortment of fruit…then asked us to give it away to others. By this time it is close to midnight. I am hungry. Exhausted from carrying our stuff and speed walking throughout the city. Yet, giving away what God blessed us with was an incredible privilege. God let us be a part of His plan to bless those who truly needed dinner that night. Then God provided dinner again for us.
This weekend showed me how God is always at work and in control of our lives, even when we don’t feel or see Him. Even at times when I feel like He is silent, God’s plan is in motion. He desires to have a relationship with me. He desires to have my complete trust. He desires me to be available. He desires me to accept His love. He desires to use me for far greater things than I can fathom. I am humbled and amazed!
