7 days!
I have 7 days left until I leave what I’ve called “home” for the last 31 years of my life and honestly I DON’T KNOW how to feel.
Lately, I’ve been experiencing a slew of emotions and feelings. Anxiousness, doubt, fear, excitement, frustration, nervousness, and insecurity have all consumed my heart and mind. Sometimes I’ve even experienced them throughout an entire day, or if I’m honest, all at once. I’ve cried at least 2 times everyday for the last week (*Confession:I’m a cry baby and very emotional! My close friends and family know this all too well! LOL!)
These emotions and feelings have been stemming from a variety of things:
- My personal finances
- My car not being sold yet
- Certain relationships
- The fear of the unknown
- The thought of rather or not this is what I’m supposed to be doing
However, the Lord has been whispering to me and leading me back to his word. He’s been reminding me of the truth found in his word:
- “Above all else, guard your heart.”(Proverbs 4:23).
- “Trust God from the bottom of your heart; Don’t try and figure out everything on your own.”(Proverbs 3:5-6 MSG)
- “Trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) in the Lord and do good.”-(Psalm 37:3 AMPC)
- “Delight yourself also in the Lord, and he will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart.”(Psalm 37:4 AMPC)
- “My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.” (Isaiah 55: 8 NLT)
- “Now faith (Keyword NOW FAITH) is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” (Hebrews 11:1 NKJV)
I’ll be honest, I’ve been consuming myself with packing, trying to spend some last minute time with friends and family, and the distraction of social media, that I haven’t spent much time in the presence of the Father. So, today while driving home, I put on this worship song “You Deserve It” by JJ Hairston & Youthful Praise and worshiped all the way home. Just by doing that, I felt like a heavy load was removed from my heart and my level of stress decreased. Since then, I’ve just been in worship mode. There’s nothing like worship! It’s the best and only stress relief!
One thing I’ve learned is that feelings are just that; feelings and not facts. Even though things around me are not quite in order all the way (learning to relinquish control and let God be God and release my idol of being a control freak), I know that it’s all going to work out for my good and that this entire process is teaching me something.
I know God is a just God and that he’s able to do exceedingly, abundantly all I could ask, think or imagine (Ephesians 3:20), but I’m human and the devil is a deceiver. His job is to make me feel and experience all the feelings and emotions listed above and take my eye off the Father by focusing on my situation and not the one who controls the situation… However, the promises given to me in the word are:
- “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”-John 14:27 (NKJV)
- “ Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.”-Phillippians 4: 6-7 (NLT)
So, for these next 7 days, I’m going to strive to keep my mind and heart set on his word (CLEAR VISION Best Friend 
) and try not to let the falseness of my emotions control me. Praying God’s blessings over you, your family, finances, health, dreams and heart’s desires in 2018!
xoxo,
Ramesha Nicole
**Vashawn Mitchell’s “His Record” plays in the background as I complete this post.
Praise Report:
I am now 60.05% funded. As of today, due to your generous love, support and gifts, I am at a fundraising total of $10,448. This means I am able to launch to my first country of Indonesia. My next goal of $13,000 is due in February. However, I’m praying and believing to be FULLY FUNDED by next week. I ask that you stand in agreement with me, and as always, if you feel led, please continue to donate so that I can remain on the field and continue to “go into all the nations.”
