There once was a boy who used to go play under a tree by his house. He went to this tree every day and sat.
One day he was sitting under the tree when he saw a bird.
The bird looked at the little boy and said, “Look boy! Aren’t I so beautiful with all my colors? For sure you can tell I am a beautiful bird. Look at how my feathers fluff tall in the wind!”
The boy laughed and said, “I know you are a bird!”
The next day the boy came back and again the bird was there.
The bird looked at the little boy and said, “Look boy! Watch as I eat this worm like other birds do! For sure you can tell I am a bird because I eat worms!”
The boy laughed and said, “I know you are a bird!”
The next day the boy came back and again the bird was there.
The bird looked at the little boy and said, “Look boy! Listen to me sing, for sure you can tell I am a bird by the way I play lovely melodies!”
The boy laughed and said, “I know you are a bird!”
The next day the boy came back and again the bird was there.
The bird looked at the little boy and said, “Look boy! Watch me fly, for sure you can tell I am a bird by the way I soar through the air!”
The boy did not laugh.
Instead he turned right to the bird and said, “Silly bird, I know you are a bird. You do not need to show me every day that you are a bird. You have nothing to prove for I know you. You are a bird.”
Just as the bird continuously tried to prove he was a bird, performing for the little boy to show off everything he could do, we attempt to prove to people who we are. We attempt to put on the best performances to be the best sons, the best friends, the best roommates, wives, teammates, children, and/or Christians. However, just as the little boy tells the bird he has nothing to prove, God tells us we have nothing to prove. He simply knows us. We don’t have to try to measure up. We don’t have to burn out from striving so hard. He knows we are His sons and daughters, and there is nothing more we need to do.
I recently read a book by Jennie Allen called Nothing to Prove. If you are one of my squadmates reading this you will laugh at me because I haven’t shut up about it. Its I N C R E D I B L E. So read it. This past month I was overcome with an identity issue. I found God calling me to admit something I said with full confidence to friends and family was not an issue for me.
I told lies that I did/do not care what others think. I told lies that I work for God and God alone. I told lies that I do not compare myself to others for God has made me wonderfully unique. Lies. Lies I told myself and lies I told others.
I need to confess, I need to stand boldly in front of all of you and say I try to measure up, I strive for others, I drown myself in comparison and accomplishment. I am learning now that I cannot manipulate God by my performance. I don’t have to because I have nothing to prove.
More than that, I am learning that it’s okay to not be enough because He is. Human problems multiplied with human resources and human solutions will never equal enough.
I’m getting to a place where I can admit that I am inadequate and that I carry baggage and sin. I have tried measuring up, I have tried to numb out pain with Netflix, sleep, alcohol, busyness, etc. I am tired of striving to be enough and to prove something to those around me and to God.
It’s time to break these chains and step into freedom. I am entering a trade season in my life.
My current players —> Players I wish to acquire
Comfort of Netflix – His wonder
Validity of social media – Satisfaction of a deep relationship with God
Addiction to shopping and tangible things bringing me happiness – Truth
Laziness and seeing time with God as a chore – Pure freedom
Allen mentions all things Jesus is better than.
She writes, “Jesus is better than all pleasures you can find, better than being in love, better than being liked, better than a new puppy on Christmas, better than a month long beach vacation, better than sex, better than your dream job, better than all the things from your favorite store.”
However then she challenges the reader – be honest with yourself, do you believe this? To be transparent with you guys I answered no. To which I need to confess that I then believe in joy without Jesus and I don’t ever want to claim that. To recognize our need for God is the beginning of finding Him.
Upon finding out that Jesus is enough I now know I can rest, I can risk things for His glory, I can trade my fear for hope, I can embrace grace and I can live out my true calling.
To say this happened at a snap of a finger is wrong. I still struggle with performing. Daily, I find myself doing things so people will believe I am a good daughter, a good girlfriend, and a good Christian. LIKE WHAT?! I should not have to prove any of that. So I am continuously working on being okay with not being enough and knowing He is. However, many of you may ask… yeah Rachel, that all sounds great, but how do I get there? How do I do that?
My advice:
1. Spend time with the Lord and write down exactly what keeps you in bondage. Is it Netflix, sleep, shopping, drugs, alcohol, toxic relationships, likes on Instagram, having a significant other, good grades, making a parent proud, earning a starting position on your sports team, holding a leadership title? What is it that you do not want to confess? What is holding you back from God? Remember: it may not seem like something intentionally bad- the devil is not always obvious with the way he attacks. If that were the case, it would be easy for us to deny him.
2. Ask the Lord for forgiveness & freedom for all that you are ashamed of, all you are tired of, all you are empty from.
3. Ask someone you trust to pray for you. To hold you accountable for your actions. Find someone you can talk to about the thoughts and lies you struggle with.
4. Repeat – we need to do this daily for we fall short of the grace of God all the time. Bring yourself back to His love and His presence.
The freedom I have been finding in this race has been incredible. The love I am shown by God is one I want to be able to take home and share with my parents, my sister, my boyfriend, my friends, co-workers, and neighbors. The Lord called me to abandonment from a lot of comforts to help me receive so much more of His love and I am so grateful. Just as the boy understood the bird’s identity without his demonstrations, Christ knows us and accepts us before we ever do anything. We no longer have to measure up – He knows us, He values us, He loves us – we have nothing to prove.
Much love and many blessings,
Rachel
