I’m going to be really honest. As I was packing for training camp, a voice in the back of my mind was saying: “Just because you are going to training camp doesn’t mean you have to go on the race. You can still back out. You still have an out.”
Now, as a supporter, before you freak out, I am not going to back out. I am going on the World Race. But I want to revisit this because I want to unpack why I was feeling this way. There were so many lies that I was believing at this time, and I didn’t even recognize it.
Let me preface by explaining that I am a comfort idolater and the World Race is VERY out of my comfort zone, as it is for many. The biggest worry for me from the very beginning has been being away from my family and friends for a long period of time. Eleven months is a long time! But, from the time that the Lord put this trip on my heart I have been fighting that fear and striving to be obedient to what the Lord is calling me to do. Before training camp, I could compartmentalize my current life by keeping the World Race as something that I would tell people I was doing after graduation. Don’t get me wrong, I recognized the weight of my decision and I was serious about my commitment, but it was almost like I was in denial.
When I got to training camp, I had to face that reality. And man, it. was. hard. The first night we got there we had worship, and I was continually crying because I was overwhelmed with fear, anxiety, and utter disbelief that I was actually THERE.
Throughout the week, the Lord revealed the lies that I had been believing from the enemy. Deep down, I believed that I was not an important part of the squad that I was in and that I didn’t fit the “mold” of a missionary. He told me that it wouldn’t matter if I went or not. Man, did the Lord destroy these lies.
I have experienced Christ-like community before, but never like this. Other than a group message, most of the people on my squad had never met before the first day of training camp. But man, we quickly became like a family. When you strip a group of people from their comforts, I believe it leaves a lot of room for vulnerability and growth, because you have nothing to hide behind. I experienced this first-hand. Of course, our brotherhood and sisterhood in Christ made for an incredible foundation for this to occur. The intentionality of everyone was contagious, as was the feeling of freedom.
At training camp, we slept in our tents, ate ethnic food, followed ethnic customs (including dress), took bucket showers (good times), slept in our tents (AND hammocks for one night!), endured many scenarios of what life would be like on the field, and grew in our walk with the Lord. Some of the scenarios included sleeping in an “airport,” where we slept on the floor of the training center with the lights on and with loud noises on repeat for the entire night, getting our luggage “stolen” and having to share tents with squad-mates, and having to pack up our packs within a moment’s notice to “catch the bus.” We also had an evening where we went to the “market.” We had to barter for our food with our team. It was probably one of my favorite things!
My favorite night was probably the evening that they provided our squad with food to cook over the fire and allowed us all to bond for the night at our campsite. After we had all eaten dinner and our s’mores (thanks, Allison!) one of my sweet squad-mates Kayla had something to say. Prompted by the Holy Spirit, she explained that many of us had many lies that we were believing that evening, and she had the idea of physically “throwing them into the fire.” So, she started by stating her lie, and then throwing a stick into the flames. This started a chain reaction where people were stepping up, sharing the lie(s) they were believing, and then throwing them into the fire. It was a beautiful and freeing experience sandwiched with incredible and authentic worship!
There are so many things I learned at training camp, but I think my biggest takeaway is the ownership of my journey. The last day of camp, everyone on the squad read and signed an agreement that we were going to live by over this next year. After reading and signing, we were supposed to come up with our “yes” to the great commission that the Lord has called us to. Specifically, we were stating our “yes” to the race. We were then to go and tell it to our squad mentor, Allison, and she would repeat her “yes “to all of us, which was that she would fight for us.
I don’t remember the exact words I used, but in summary my “yes” is that I abandon my worldly comforts and commit to share the love of Christ. This activity allowed me to take ownership of how the Lord is challenging me and calling me to live beyond myself and share the life-changing gospel with people around the world.
Thank you to everyone who prayed over our training camp. Your prayers were heard, and more specifically, the Holy Spirit was at work! He was moving in each of our hearts in such a unique way, and preparing us for what is to come. I am choosing to be obedient to His call, but I am not alone. Not only do I have brothers and sisters to fight for me, but I have family and friends praying for me, and the Holy Spirit walking through every valley and mountain alongside me.
Here are some pictures from training camp. Because, if you’re like me, I LOVE pictures!
Here is a picture of our campsite! Our squad of 32 slept here every night.
Here is a picture of the last night of camp. We had to put our tents away that morning wet, and none of us wanted to get them back out. So, we had HAMMOCK CITY!!!!!
Here is a picture of my squad along with our squad mentor, Allison, and mobilizer, Austin. There are 32 of us, and we are from all over the US (and even London and Spain!!!!). We will travel together to the different countries but split up into our teams when we get there to do ministry.
Here is my team!!!!! After days of team-building exercises and prayers, we were placed on a team where we will learn from and fight for each other. These are the people I will be doing life with for at least the first four months! Left to right: Hannah, Zach (Davis), Julie, me, Zack (Sharp), and Dylan. Their blogs are to the left of my blog home page if you would like to check out what the Lord is doing in their lives! Please be praying for each of them as some of them still have a financial deadline to meet before we launch. If you feel lead, they would SO appreciate any donation as well!
