How do Mom and Dad do this?
I wish you understood how many times I have asked myself that question on the Race.
There are so many times that I get tired of loving people, I get tired of saying yes to God, I get tired of surrendering control, I get tired of choosing self-denial while others choose self-indulgence, but I know that this is the pathway to abundant life.
I have seen my parents make these hard choices and I know how much good lies on the other side of self-discipline and self-denial and trusting God and I am encouraged by their lives to keep pushing on.
You see my parents ruined me.
They set me up to fail.
I cannot succeed in this world system.
There are times where I want to be “normal” and I want to cuss and drink to fit in or I want to ditch my commitment to purity for moments of comfort, or live my life for myself, but I fail miserably.
I was taught love over selfishness. I was taught integrity over self gain. I was taught to fear God rather than to fear man.
I am forever indebted to my parents for teaching me God’s truth and allowing me to encounter God for myself, so that I would be convinced that God’s love is better than anything that this world could offer.
I felt it only right to honor my mom by asking her to write something for my blog, so without further ado, here it is!
From the desk of Sybil Bull
Oh my goodness, I have graduated and now its time to start living my life. I am about to make things happen. College here I come; finally getting away from home and about to do my thing. Yes super excited for my new beginning!!
Wait!!! Wait!! This is not the things I have set for my future. God has spoken to me about all the things he wants me to do and I am so not ready to give up and do it all. I am walking out my life; my plans; my desires!! Don’t judge me, its my life!
Twenty six years ago that was me. I was not jumping at the plans God had for me. He wanted me to leave my family, get married, have children, sacrifice my desires for His. I want you to know he was not going to get a “YES” without a fight! I was determined that some where in his plans I would get my way. What a joke for me to think I could out smart God. I slowly but surely began to give in to God.
The first nine years was a whirlwind of what God wanted and it had to be in His timing. I gave birth to seven children in those nine years, and I probably cried more for the death of my life than you could imagine.
Looking back and seeing the divine strategy of God has made be truly humbled to know I was a part of the big picture concerning His plan. I was able to give birth to a person who would one day face the same decisions as I did. Rachelle would have to decide if she would fight for her life or give it to God to do with it as He pleased.
Its with joy I write this, understanding that my sacrifice has allowed me to see Gods love and compassion for His creation through the eyes of my own daughter. Rachelle thanks for saying YES, and submitting your life to God for his glory.
I miss my parents so incredibly much, but their legacy and their lessons and their love surges through me daily and I know the Savior because of them. Love you mom and dad! Thank you for ruining me to live a mediocre, self-centered life and pushing me towards Christ.
