A moment to process what was happening, and then I was under water. The world dimmed to a muffled roar, and adrenaline heightened the feel of the water engulfing me. I was weightless and seemingly motionless compared to the powerful water vacuuming me backward.
Don’t panic.
Lack of control had fear eating at the edges of my rationalizations. I couldn’t swim if I tried. I waited for my lifejacket to tell me which way was up.
Despite a strong effort from the white waters, I didn’t let go of the flipped raft. I showed the Nile who was boss.
I love adrenaline. After a particularly scary rapid, I started laughing. Obviously the natural response to fear, nervousness, and joy. I was scared all day. And it was awesome.
Riding home after the kabobs and cold drinks, I had revelation after revelation of how our ride in the Kingdom of God is similar to rafting the Nile.
The rapids are what you make them. If you paddle left on the 50/50, you will have a different experience than those who take the Chicken Line. God only gives us as much as we seek. Many times, our fears keep us from experiencing the fullness of God’s power.
Being in the Nile’s white waters was scary at times. From my boat, all I could see was a power greater than me. My guide, however, had spent time intimately getting to know the river. He eagerly scanned the surface of the waters looking for the whirlpools that he could dive into and ride all the way to the bottom. He understood his authority in the river. He saw the white waters as something to respect and partner with instead of fighting for independence and control.
In the same way, God is not asking us to live for “right and wrong”, “good or bad”—He is asking us to live in full dependence to Him. Not a polluted dependence, but one based on love and great joy.
When we get in over our heads, we must have faith in our “armor”—lifejacket and helmet. We are equipped enough to connect with the surface, even if it seems in the moment that no air is near. God has given us the tools we need to fight the spiritual battles in faith. We don’t fight alone. If we panic and flail, we will run out of air. The moment when we relinquish our need for control and trust in His abilities is when we rise to the surface.
The more my guide learned about the river, the more he realized there was more to discover. More areas to explore. More power to partner with and get excited about. I am learning the same as I explore what it means to be a daughter of God.
The mysteries of the river, and the Kingdom, are never-ending. It makes for a fun ride.
