As I walked away from my home for the month of November, I turned out of the driveway to head back to the ministry. It was a hot, sunny day and I could feel the heat warming up my bald head. I was one step away from being out of sight of the house when I heard my name, “Raquel, Raquel”. The voice was of a young, yet very ambitious 8-year-old girl who just happened to be our adopted daughter for the month. I wheeled around and headed back to the house as Molly came prancing down the driveway to meet me.
Through the trees that lined the street, I saw her bright pink shirt peeking in and out of the branches as she cavorted down the driveway. She rushed up to me as if something was wrong or as if I had forgotten something important. Next thing I felt was the most passionate embrace around my mid-section I ever have received. As she squeezed me as hard as she could, her face tilted back to meet my gaze. I stared at her sun touched dark skin, her beautiful brown eyes and a smile spreading across her face, which displayed the nubs of her adult teeth coming through. She didn’t have anything in her hands to give me or any words to present to me. She didn’t have anything tangible. She had something more significant.
She gave me what I have been praying for, a purpose.
Prior to this moment, I was asking God how my team was impacting our city here in Nicaragua. We’ve been teaching English, playing sports with the boys school we are at, helping cook, craft, form relationships with the staff and boys and odd jobs here and there around the center. I was questioning the impact our team was making. I was questioning if what we were doing was enough. And to that question, what IS enough?
I had all these thoughts swirling around in my head and in my heart. It had been consuming my everyday thoughts. Every moment I thought it, I prayed for it. Every moment I had a doubt, I rebuked it. Every moment I looked into the future, I asked God to bring me to the present. I am telling you people, it was a MIND BATTLE.
It’s easy to overlook the impact of the people surrounding you.
It’s easy to focus on “traditional ministry”.
It’s easier to see the impact of ministry when it’s more tangible.
It’s easier to see what we could do rather what we have done.
And today God taught me
it’s easy to show my love ALL the time when you’re giving from your overflow whether that’s in a big C-church or a little c-church
Who knows, maybe my teams purpose here at this specific location, at this specific time, in this specific country, is to serve our hosts and their family. I don’t know the answer. But I do know God’s voice and actions win over anything we can do with our human hands. He wins every time.
Every morning God is waiting to give me a “Molly sized hug”. He is waiting. Sometimes I give that hug to my pillow instead of God. And sometimes I drag my butt up extra early and meet Him and receive that embrace.
I have been missing that embrace. Thank you Molly for showing me a glimpse of how near God is and how he loves us.
