Today I leave for the World Race. Launch is now just 1 flight and a few hours away. I find myself continually saying, 'What the hell?'. I have so many emotions and mixed feelings going on. I feel nervous, scared, anxious, insecure, unprepared, and truly just freaked out.
But I hear it's normal.
I also feel excited, expectant, sure, and just too pumped for words.
I also hear it's normal.
So with all these added, I sometimes feel numb.
And that, as I hear, is also normal.
How are all these feelings normal? My emotions are like a roller coaster. So what I have to stand on is what I believe I heard God say "Go."
And that needs to be enough. There are a MILLION reasons to not go. And most are good reasons. But there is only 1 reason I'm going and that has to be, and is, enough.
There will never be a 'perfect' time because everything about this isn't natural.
This trip is so beyond me in EVERY way. And that's OK. It needs to be like this. I can't rely on anything from me. In my weakness He is strong. And He has A TON of ways to be strong in my life. So I will choose to trust and rest in that.
To all those who have supported me through encouragement, finances, and prayer, I want to say (in my favorite color)
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!
When I have doubted, God has used you through actions and words to show me Him. Funds have come in that I'm still in awe of God. I feel strength from those who cover me in prayer. Watch what God will do.
Now I look at this trip with determination. Ready to hit the ground running. Ready for ALL of God in EVERY way and I say, 'What the hell!.'
"And if not now, when?"
