When I first met Sam, I thought he was the guy with tattoos, who woke up an hour earlier than everyone else to work out intensely because he was preparing for a kickboxing match, while simultaneously fasting for several days for who knows what reason. He was home-schooled and never went to college, but worked with his hands a lot, walked on his tip toes barefooted, and really seemed like a tough guy, almost untouchable. He was definitely not someone I would naturally choose to associate with much less love like a brother. Yet, here we are at the end of month five and I love spending time with him – watching him grow in boldness as the Lord challenges him, whose heart breaks for the things that break God’s heart, learning new guitar rhythms from him, marveling at his Mr. Fix-It creativity to fashion a spatula out of chopsticks and a plastic plate so I can flip pancakes, and trusting that He will give me the encouragement and honest push in the right direction when I need it.
God is teaching me to look beyond outward appearances, beyond the resume, beyond the first impression. Impressions are just that, skin deep, not an indelible imprint. Impressions don’t actually demonstrate the state of mind or the condition of someone’s heart. When God was choosing a king in answer to the Israelites plea, he sent Samuel to find him in shepherd’s fields. “But the LORD said to Samuel, ‘Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.â€� 1 Samuel 16:7. God chose David, a lowly shepherd boy, not the strongest or bravest, not the most experienced or educated. He sought the one who’s heart was relentlessly in pursuit of God’s own heart; David, a man after God’s own heart. 1 Samuel 13:14. God does not see you and me as we see each other. He sees our hearts – our passions and compassion, our desires and motivations, our attitudes and character.
Each month, I start fresh in making impressions and I choose whether or not I will be authentic and genuine. Sometimes, I wonder if it wouldn’t be easier to just give off a pleasant, friendly impression and call it a day. But at the end of that day, my impact will be as fleeting as a smile. Yet, if I choose to give all of myself, I may leave an indelible imprint that could resonate long after I’ve left this place. So every month, I choose not to settle for impressions. I choose to give everything I have to offer, in my beauty and in my brokeness. I wonder how this world would be changed with love if we all looked beyond impressions and became vulnerable with each other. I wonder how community would grow in love for each other, when we see ourselves and each other as God sees us… if we looked at heart matters.
