I recently posted a picture on Instagram with a caption that explained my struggle with total trust. I explained how growing up, I have always had family and friends to lean on. I also had the comfort of shelter and finances. So when it came to struggle and trials, I never had to 100% put all faith in God because I had this cushion of material things that seemed to hold me up a little longer.
In saying this, it has caused issues so far through this race in my spiritual life. When you do not have the safety of family, friends, in some cases shelter and finances, your only choice is to trust in our Fathers’ plan. How do you trust completely? That was my question. I know that the best way to learn is to ask for it. I began to pray and ask God to show me ways to grow in my trust. I was tired of having small ounces of doubt in the back of my mind. I want to have the type of faith that moves mountains when I ask. I want to see miracles before my eyes because I KNOW my God can do it. This is my prayer I prayed:
“My Father, You know my heart. You know I have trouble with waivering trust and faith. You know that I want to trust you completely in EVERYTHING I do. I ask You to take me to a place where my trust is without borders. I ask that You DO put me in the hard places so that I have no other place to turn but to You. I am seeking growth, and I know You will bless me in that. I love you El-Roi. You see me.”
After praying this prayer, I walked in boldness knowing God will take me deeper. Why would He not right? I began to talk to others about “doubt” and their thoughts on how to get away from it. I got great feedback and advice, but the average response was, “Just ask God to take you deeper.” I had done this so I assumed I was on the right track.
My last few days in Dominican Republic were awesome. I stayed up considerably late one night to just be still before God. He gave me this vision of a ship in waters. The ship was confined by these stone walls. It was going full speed to the top left corner of these walls. As the vision got more clear, I noticed the corner it was headed to was broken down and had a large opening. So obviously, what this vision meant was that I was about to get to the point where I will be excercising my faith and trust. I take delight in this because I love that He pretty much warned me that it was coming. I am ready to face this head on and see where this takes me!
God is good, and He will answer your prayers!
On another note, I AM IN JAMAICA! I absolutely love it here! Its beautiful and everything I expected it to be!
In Christ,
Preston
