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As I got older I tried hard not to have to make too many decisions, things that could change my comfortable situation. I wanted to stay childlike, but God in his infinite wisdom was always there putting new decisions before me, creating a more mature me.
I had to decide where I would go to university, what I would do for a job, what I would do on my year off, what subjects to take, which jobs to apply for, which state to live in, which country to go to, which family to live with. The decisions got harder and harder, but then so did my dependence on God.
This is one of the things I have struggled with as a Christian. To grow up meant I also had to grow up spiritually! I was very comfortable living on the edge of obedience. I was still doing the things I did as a Christian child, I barely read the word of God, only prayed when I needed something and went to church because that’s what we did. After 15 years of doing this, I finally felt God say GROW UP!
So I did and instead of finding it hard it felt so right. I was ready to be totally reliant on God, to obey his commands, to get deeper into his word and to go out and see what his first disciples saw. None of them were baby Christians. They all had to grow up fast and they did amazing things. They were all totally dependant on God and they saw miracles, performed miracles and died changing a world.
As a more mature Christian, God gave me this verse as my life verse Proverbs 19:21 “There are many plans in a man’s (woman’s) heart, but it is the plans of the Lord that stay.” I have always been making plans, thinking up adventures I could do and until I started thinking about the will of God for my life, none of them came into being. As I started seeking out God’s plan for me, He started to make ways for me to accomplish these plans
