I can not begin to express to you my frustration. I know I have been quiet lately, my last blog was quite a while ago. But there is no way around it. I don't know what to say. My next race is coming up on Saturday, it is the big one. My Marathon. It was the race I was looking forward to the most. Before I injured my foot. Now it seems to just be another thing I have to do. I really really wanted to run this race, at my best. I know that with everything else going on, running my best race is out of the question. Seriously, perhaps I should have sat down and thought through my choices before I just signed up. I think in a way, it was a blessing.
But as I think about my race, I am filled with thoughts of failure. It is a reminder that I wasn't able to do what I set out to do. I know this may seem crazy to you, but it is what I feel. I know that just crossing that line is all I need to do, but some how I feel that that is just not enough. This, of course, is a lie.
Maybe I just need to let it go. Stop being so prideful and just enjoy the journey, no matter what that means. Even if it means walking. There is nothing wrong with walking right?
Saturday morning starting at 7:45 am I will be running a Marathon for the country of Cambodia. Pops and I will head up there Friday night. The race is in Duluth, MN.
There will be many times of frustration in my life. (Many) Sometimes, well most of the time, life doesn't always go the way you planed. We can't change the course of how things happen, all we can do is change ourselves. More importantly, our attitudes. I could have said, "Since I can't run the race how I wanted, I just wont do it." I could even have that attitude as I ran. But what good does that do besides make everyone around me miserable.
In spite of my frustration, I choose to run the race. I might have to walk…..I figure if I walked the entire race it would take me about 5 hours. I will do what I can. And I will enjoy each minute of it, keeping my eyes open. Who knows who I will meet out there.
26.2 miles.
