The first nine months of the race have been amazing, but I believe these last two will be even better. God still has a lot He wants to do in me, and although I don’t even know exactly what that looks like, I want to share with you the little I do know.
Since the middle of September, I have had prophetic words (basically, the words of the Lord spoken through people) spoken over me. It seems that in these last months, God wants to teach me a lot about faith and love. It’s His goal to show me how to love Him the way that I should. Sure, I love God, but when I think about His love for me, my little love doesn’t come close. You see, God loves me unconditionally. It doesn’t matter what I do, where I go, what I say, He still loves me with all His heart. It doesn’t matter how many good things I do, or how many bad things I do…He still loves me the same. Why does He do this, you ask? I can’t figure it out myself, because of how badly I have treated Him over the years, but…He is my heavenly Father, and because He is my Father, He just loves me no matter what. If you have a child, or even if you have good parents, I am sure you understand.
Whenever God does something I don’t like, or does something I don’t want Him to, I find myself getting frustrated. Why? I guess I am stubborn and I want to be in control. I see things in my own little world from my own perspective and think I know what is right. I fail to grasp that God sees everything, and He knows what is best for me. He knows which paths end in failure and death, and He knows which one ends in the light. God also knows which struggles I need to go through in order to grow stronger and gain the skills and knowledge that will make me a better person.
I’ve given God my life because He will take care of me. Sometimes I pull back, trying to hold onto something that’s no longer mine, and it only gets me in trouble. It is hard at times, when you’re in the valley, to see God…but I know He’s crying with me when I am there. After all, He sent Jesus Christ to die for us, so that we can re-establish a relationship with Him…and if He loves us that much, why would He not care if we were in some hard times? The good news is that He always rescues us from those times before they overwhelm us.
My challange from this point in is to have the faith that God is in control and to trust in all He puts me through. It is my challenge to love Him enough to accept that, and in the highs and the lows to love Him with all my heart, and not to get upset or frustrated. God never does anything bad to us, even though we do so many bad things to Him. It’s just not in His nature. He will punish us, but is there a good parent out there who wouldn’t?
I know this challenge will carry me even beyond the race, and I have no idea how long it will take me to fully grasp, if ever. Please pray that I will have the wisdom to accept these prophetic words and to start walking in them right away. I know it’s going to be a tough time, and God is going to take me a lot of places I don’t want to go, but I am okay with that. Now, more than ever, I will need those prayers! God is slowly revealing things about the future, but the one thing I can tell you is this – the race is only the beginning!
