When the beginning of February rolled around I was excited because it meant two things: 1). I am half way done with the Race and 2). We were moving locations from a tiny village to a bigger city. We were told by our hosts that moving to a bigger city (from Chintheche to Nkhotakota) would mean we could finally find ice cream and pizza! What we weren’t told was that this month would be the hardest for us physically, spiritually and mentally.
My team struggled physically because we had expectations/promises from our pastors that were never met. We lived in a lovely home with another family of five. This home was surrounded by a gate and we were told we couldn’t leave because of safety reasons. At first it wasn’t a problem. Then we started to notice that the only two places where we could go was our community room or the front porch. The only people we could see was our team and the host family. Slowly and surely we started going bananas. I felt like I was stuck in a prison when we were not having ministry (only time we could go out of our house).
Mentally I felt like I was going a tad crazy. There was only so much I could do in the house: read the Bible, workout, talk to my team and watch the same 3 movies over and over again. I began to wonder why the Lord had put us there. Was I actually doing anything to further his Kingdom being stuck in a house?
Not only was I mentally and physically drained but ministry was equally as challenging.. We continued our door to door evangelism, just in a different community. A Muslim community. We saw a lot more demons being cast out, and an evil oppression on the whole city of Nkhotakota. To me it became a boring routine of waking up and going to preach to people then coming back home to do nothing. Two weeks into the first month, my negative feelings about ministry were beginning to take root. I actually prayed that it would rain or something else so we didn’t have to go. I began to become more negative about our living conditions, and our ministry. I became bitter about being on the Race and overall I just wanted to go home. I was angry because I didn’t want to just survive the Race I wanted to thrive!
The Lord has taught me that sometimes when you live life on mission it can be hard. You will have trials and tribulations, but no matter what you go through the Father is always there with you. Jesus has been there for me the whole month, fighting for me and my team everyday. I am so grateful to have him on my side.
Romans 5:1-5 “Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.”
Only one more country (Guatemala) and 3 more months to go!! I’m so thankful and joyful that you have come along on this journey with me. I am learning and growing along the road. Thank you for your prayers and support, I’m getting closer to my goal of being fully funded. I’m looking forward to finishing this race strong with the Lord.
