If you know me at all, you’d recall that I like things just so. In order. Organized. Polished. When I have something planned, I like to stick with it and follow through. Sudden and abrupt change doesn’t always sit well with me. This has been something that I’ve constantly had to lay at the foot of the cross, trusting that Jesus would provide with me the strength and wisdom that I need to get through whatever it is.
As of a few days ago, my world completely flipped upside-down, and i’ve REALLY had to lay it all down and T R U S T.
That being said…
I will not be launching in September with V Squad. I will instead be launching next September on an entirely new route with an entirely new squad.
I’ll admit, lately i’ve caught myself screaming at God. Mad. Angry. Hurting. In pain. Another year of working and taking classes at school wasn’t exactly what I had planned on. I wanted to get out there to see and experience all that God had in store for me on the missions field. I felt so called to the race, and still do. I saw a future in missions, and still do. So WHY am I waiting 12 more months? WHY not now, God?
As all of these thoughts and questions dance through my mind, I forget one thing. One key thing thats been on my heart since training camp.
S U R R E N D E R
“By saying yes to Him and picking up the cross daily, we need to accept that our lives are not our own.”
First of all, thanks Hope for this. This was something that she had said to all 6 of the squads during our very first camp session. Saying yes to Jesus can be fun and seemingly easy, but it can also be hard and challenging.
I think that the most difficult thing for me to realize when I came to this decision, was that I was actually saying Yes to God and obeying. I’m NOT giving up and I am NOT walking away.
I refuse to be anxious and scared about what my future holds, because I have a Father who has already gone before me and who also is walking right along side of me through it all.
So, thanks. Thanks God, for being a faithful father who has continuously provided for me. Thanks V Squad & the leadership team for showing the Father’s kindness to me as I walk through this. Thanks supporters for financially helping me get to this point, on a super happy note I’m about 1/3 of the way fundraised for next year! Woo hoo! Thanks friends & fam for the prayers always. I’m so loved.
Prayers would be so greatly appreciated as I transition into this season, and as I continue my fundraising journey.
All the love,
Nikki
